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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24981610">How you wish it would be all the time</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/1955/pseuds/1955'>1955</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Avatar: Legend of Korra</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Best Friends, Childhood Friends, F/F, Slow Burn, first chapter is backstory then we get into angst babbbeeeeey, its gonna be pretty canon compliant but with the twist that korrasami grew up as besties</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-06-29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 01:54:45</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>5</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>26,149</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24981610</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/1955/pseuds/1955</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>"Asami gripped her hand. 'I’m so glad you’re my best friend, Korra.'</p><p>Korra smiled at her. 'We’ll always be best friends. I promise you that.'"</p><p>Korra and Asami grow up as best friends. After losing contact for a couple years, Korra moves to Republic City to finish her Air Bending training. Republic City is huge, though, there's no way she's gonna run into Asami, right?</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Korra/Asami Sato</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>69</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>357</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. This dream isn't feeling sweet</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Hi there! </p><p>Aside from the obvious twist this story will be pretty canon compliant. </p><p>After this chapter, it's going to head into slow-burn territory and lots of pining(my favorite). The title of this Fanfic and of this chapter comes from Ribs by Lorde.</p><p>Thanks to my gf for reading this over, as always.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The Southern Water Tribe was known for its natural beauty, the pristine wild life, and the rich spiritual energy that, to some people, it was worth the trek to the bottom of the world. Hiroshi Sato agreed that the multiple-day long boat trip to the Southern Water Tribe was worth it, but he was visiting for a different reason--oil. The land of the Southern Water Tribe was constantly covered with a thick blanket of snow, but Hiroshi and his team of scientists had located a copious supply of oil just below the surface-- and what better to support his growing Satomobile business than oil to fuel them?</p><p>Usually, Hiroshi made business trips on his lonesome, but his wife insisted on coming with him--talking about how she had always wanted to see the water tribes and how beneficial it would be to start exposing Asami to the many cultures of the world at a young age. He felt she was plenty <em>exposed</em> in diverse Republic City, but he could never deny his wife what she wanted, and now he, his wife, his 4 year old daughter, and a small team of staff were only a few hours away from docking.</p><p>Yasuko was laughing, holding Asami up to the windows while she pressed her chubby fingers against the glass, leaving sticky marks. In total honesty, Hiroshi had not been looking forward to this trip. The Southern Water Tribe was still largely underdeveloped and he had never been a fan of the cold, but maybe Yasuko was right that they needed to show Asami the world. And nothing brought him more joy than showing off his perfect daughter.</p><p>When they docked a few hours later, a small team was waiting to greet them. The Southern Water Tribe was still rebuilding, and the economic boost that a deal with Future Industries offered apparently warranted a welcoming committee.</p><p>“Mr. Sato? Welcome! Thank you for travelling down here to meet with us.” A booming voice met them, coming from a tall, beefy man adorned in traditional water tribe clothing. Before he could answer, a small hand tugged on his coat as Asami tried to grab her father’s attention. He pulled her up so he held her against his chest, making sure the fur of her hood was properly protecting her face from the cold.</p><p>“This must be your daughter and wife.” The man continued, smiling. “I have a daughter just a little bit younger than her. Maybe while we show you around the area we can introduce them.”</p><p>Yasuko smiled. “That sounds wonderful. Maybe after we settled in at the inn we can all meet up.” Hiroshi passed Asami over to Yasuko, enabling him to extend his hand to the man, who grasped it enthusiastically.</p><p>“I’m Tonraq, let me show you to the hotel and then we can head to the Royal Palace to start discussions.”</p><p>--</p><p><br/>
It wasn’t until she was alone with her daughter in the hotel suite that Yasuko realized she would be alone for the majority of the trip. Hiroshi had left about 30 minutes ago, and now that she recognized that she was in a new place alone with a four year old, she was grateful that Tonraq had left his home address with her staff.</p><p>She looked over to where Asami was currently pushing fruit into her mouth, grasping a crayon in her other hand while she attempted to draw pictures of cars on a piece of paper.</p><p>Yasuko crouched down in front of her, drawing her attention from her drawings. “Asami, do you want to go meet a new friend? There’s someone who is willing to show us around.”</p><p>As soon as Yasuko finished speaking, Asami went back to her drawing. “Ok, but I need to finish this first. I have a plan for Daddy’s new car.” Asami pointed at the jagged, red marks she was adding to the back of her ‘car’ drawing, “See, this one has fire coming from it so it goes faster.”</p><p>Yasuko laughed. “That’s great, baby. Tell me when you’re done and we’ll head out.”</p><p>Twenty minutes later, when the drawing of a car became unintelligible under stains of banana, Yasuko had Asami wrapped up in her coat and settled into a carriage on the way to Tonraq’s address. She delighted in pointing out the various distinct features that made Harbor City so different from their home, while Asami, forever curious, asked a million questions about how things worked here.</p><p>Soon, they pulled up in front of an igloo, and Yasuko marvelled in the quiet simplicity the house offered, so different from their mansion back home, until they heard a massive crash from the inside followed by a shrill giggle and yelling.</p><p>“Korra! What have I told you about running around inside! Get back here and pick this up or I am going to leave you with the neighbors while I show the new friends around.”</p><p>Yasuko looked down at her daughter clutching her arm. Asami was generally a quiet kid. At four, she already loved reading with her dad and spent her days designing new ‘inventions’ with her building blocks. She had a feeling Tonraq’s daughter would not be the same.</p><p>She let out a few knocks on the door, which led to more yelling from inside.</p><p>“Mama! They’re here! I’m going to get the door!”</p><p>“Korra, no! I told you not to open the door without me.”</p><p>By that point, however, it was too late and the door was opened by a small girl with three small ponytails and huge blue eyes.</p><p>“Hi! I’m Korra!” She jumped and grabbed Asami’s hand. “My mom said we’re gonna be new friends and show you around here. Are you excited?” The little girl yelled, spitting as she spoke.</p><p>To Yasuko’s surprise, her normally quiet and reserved daughter smiled at her. “Is it true you have penguins?” Korra’s eyes widened with excitement and her mouth opened as if to speak, but finally, an older woman appeared at the door, clutching a broom in her hand and pushing her hair back, looking stressed.</p><p>“Hi there! I’m Senna. I’m so sorry about Korra, she can be a handful. Please, come inside.” She breathed, ushering them both into her house.</p><p>Korra, however, wouldn’t stop bouncing. “What’s your name? How old are you? I just turned four a couple days ago and we had this huge cake.”</p><p>Asami laughed at her as Korra pulled her to an area of the igloo that was covered with toys.</p><p>“I’m Asami. I’m also four but I am about to be five. Why are there no cars here?”</p><p>Yasuko turned her attention to Senna. “It’s really nice to meet you, thanks for having us. I’m Yasuko, and as she just mentioned that is my daughter Asami.” They sat down for a few minutes, sharing some tea while their daughters became fast friends in the corner.</p><p>“Korra is really excited to go see the penguins if you are up for it. I know she can be a lot but I find it easier to control if she’s been running around outside for a while.” Senna laughed and Yasuko’s eyes crinkled as she smiled.</p><p>They were seated in a carriage but a few minutes later. Originally, both mothers sat on the same side as their daughter, but Korra kept getting up during the ride to try and sit with Asami, so they eventually shifted so the two girls could sit next to each other.</p><p>When they reached the end of town, Korra stood up on the bench and pulled Asami so she could look outside with her. The carriage came to a stop, and outside the snowy ground sloped toward the water where penguins gathered.</p><p>“See look! Penguins! My mom says when I get older I can go sledding on them. Did you know the past Avatar used to go penguin sledding? I think I should be able to go now.”</p><p>Senna rolled her eyes. “Korra, not until you’re six. Then your dad can take you out penguin sledding.” Korra groaned and sat down with a pout and Asami giggled.</p><p>“You have to wait until I come back. I want to go too.” Asami stuck out her pinkie finger. “Pinkie promise me. You’ll wait so we can go together.”</p><p>Korra hesitated, but stuck out her pinkie finger. “I promise.”</p><p>Yasuko chuckled at them. “So we’re coming back here, Asami?” She looked over to Senna with a knowing smile, and Asami nodded at her before following Korra, who was already heading over to the penguins with her arms extended.</p>
<hr/><p>It was less than a year before they went back to Harbor City. There were some problems with the drills that Hiroshi had to deal with, and Asami had been hounding her parents about seeing Korra again since they had left. Yasuko expected to spend a few hours with the family before finding ways of entertaining themselves, but they ended up spending the full two weeks with Senna and Korra. Yasuko loved talking with Senna, but it was really because Korra and Asami refused to part after they were initially introduced.</p><p>Asami wasn’t antisocial by any means, she had plenty of friends in Republic City, but Yasuko had never seen her attach herself to anyone so quickly.</p><p>Yasuko, however, was excited for another reason. The Avatar had apparently been discovered a few weeks ago, and while the identity wasn’t available to the public yet, it was published that she was a young girl from Harbor City. Yasuko hoped she could get some glimpse of the new bridge between worlds.</p><p>The second the boat pulled up to the docks, Asami was tugging at her mother with an excited look on her face. “Are we going to go see Korra now?” Yasuko rolled her eyes and Hiroshi laughed. Though Hiroshi didn’t have the time to meet Korra or Senna on his last trip, he had practically re-lived the experience through Asami recounting every single thing the girls did together.</p><p>“Tonraq is meeting us at the docks again and I am sure he will let you go and see Korra.” Hiroshi told her.</p><p>It turned out that wasn’t necessary, because as they walked off to the boat, Asami’s eyes lit up as she saw her best friend. She immediately started running toward her, as did Korra and they eventually smacked right into each other as they met in the middle. Both sets of parents laughed and greeted each other as the two kids started babbling each other.</p><p>“Mama can I show her? Can I please show Asami?” Korra pleaded up to her mom.</p><p>“Korra, no. I told you if you were careful you could show her at home in private but not here in the open.” Senna snapped, scolding her daughter over something that they had obviously fought about previously.</p><p>Korra groaned, while Asami looked at her confused. “Then can we go home? I really wanna show Asami.”</p><p>Asami cocked her head. “Show me what?”</p><p>“I can’t tell you! I need to show you it’s really cool I promise you.” Korra started pulling Asami toward the carriage waiting for them at the end.</p><p>Senna and Yasuke looked at each other, remembering the chaotic two weeks they spent together last time, and geared themselves up for another couple weeks of non-stop energy. Yasuke noticed additional stress in Senna’s eyes, and wondered if Korra had somehow become even more rambunctious than usual.</p><p>When they got back to the igloo, Korra forced the other three to sit down at the edge of the central room while she stood in the middle.</p><p>“Korra, be careful. Nothing extreme and you must be controlled. If you step out of line I’ll make you stop.” Senna instructed sternly, and for once, Korra seemed to listen intently.</p><p>Korra took a deep breath before she focused on some water in a bowl near her. As she raised her hands, the water moved with her. Some of the water spilled and it was sloppy, but Asami’s eyes were wide as she watched her.</p><p>“Korra! You’re a bender.” She squealed and she clapped her hands together. Korra smiled at her, thrilled Asami seemed to be just as excited as she was.</p><p>Korra shifted her body and let the water drop. “Wait that’s not all!” From the palms of her hand, she let a small flame out before extinguishing it so she could focus on bending a rock from the floor.</p><p>Yasuke gasped with realization, her mouth staying open as she couldn’t think of what to say.</p><p>It was Asami that broke the silence. “Korra! Korra, Korra, Korra! You’re the Avatar!” She jumped up and tackled her friend to the ground. Korra giggled at her and flicked her hand over to bring some water over, dropping it on Asami’s head.</p><p>Senna yelled, “Korra! No!” Asami, however, only laughed and shook her head so that it soaked Korra as well.</p><p>Yasuko was still in shock that the rambunctious child that her daughter could not stop talking about was the <em>Avatar</em>-- the person who was responsible for keeping peace, the most powerful bender in the world, in charge of maintaining balance-- and she was currently wrestling her daughter across the floor of the igloo.</p><p>Eventually, Senna broke them up, ushering them toward the kitchen area where she rubbed their heads with towels, shaking water on to the floor and mussing up their hair even more than it already was after wrestling.</p><p>Korra leaned over and cupped her hands around Asami’s ear, whispering something to her as Asami smiled. She sauntered over to her mother and tugged slightly on her coat, and Yasuko rolled her eyes when she noticed that Asami was already putting on her ‘puppy dog eyes,’ obviously Korra told her to ask for something.</p><p>“Mama--is it okay if I sleep over at Korra’s house tonight? Korra said her mom said it was okay and I promise I’ll be on my best behavior.” Asami begged, willing her mom to allow her.</p><p>Yasuko glanced a look over at Senna, “Are you sure that’s okay with you, Senna? I can be back around tomorrow morning to pick her up.”</p><p>Senna smiled, “That’s fine with me. Korra has wanted a sleepover since you were last here and won’t stop talking about it.”</p><p>Both Korra and Asami let out calls of celebration, rushing over to hug each other.</p><p>“Asami, this is going to be the best night ever!”</p><p>..</p><p>“This part is the engine. I don’t fully understand how it works yet, but sometimes I help my Daddy build them in the workshop. This part is the exhaust, and this gross black air comes out of-” From outside the igloo, a loud howling noise interrupted where Asami was showing Korra her drawings of cars.</p><p>Korra smiled and hopped up, cupping her ears so she could hear the howling better.</p><p>“Korra, what is that noise?” Asami asked, reaching to hold her friend’s hands.</p><p>“Those are the polar bear dogs!” Korra told her excitedly.</p><p>Behind them, Tonraq put a hand on each of the children’s backs. “Sounds like a whole pack, by the sound of it.” He commented.</p><p>Korra opened the front door of the igloo, unaffected by the sudden rush of cold air while Asami shivered. She brought her hands around her mouth and yelled back at the polar bear dogs.</p><p>“Aaaah-oooooh!” She yelled giggling as she did. “C’mon Asami, howl with me!”</p><p>Asami looked over at Korra with delight, before cupping her own hands around her mouth and howling with Korra.</p><p>Korra laughed, “Maybe if we are loud enough, we can get them to come by the house so we can see them!” She went back to howling, but Tonraq stepped in, pushing the two girls back into the house and shutting the door.</p><p>“Korra, we absolutely do not want the polar bear dogs anywhere near the igloo. They are dangerous!” Tonraq berated, Asami blushed at the sight of Korra being yelled at, but Korra just groaned.</p><p>“But, Daddy, I want to be their friend. We could play games!”</p><p>“Enough, Korra” He admonished, the stern voice enough for even Korra to take a step back. “Now why don’t you two go wash up and head to bed. I’ll be by your room later to set the fire.”</p><p>Korra groaned but grabbed Asami’s arm and dragged her to her room, muttering to herself as she did.</p><p>Hours later, Korra was awoken by the howling outside her room. She bit her lip, debating on what she should do, but when the howling sounded like an animal was in pain, she decided.</p><p>She rolled over, finding herself face to face with a sleeping Asami. She started gently jogging the other girl’s shoulder, increasing in intensity until finally Asami’s green eyes met hers.</p><p>“Asami, wake up. I think one of the polar bear dogs is hurt.” She whispered. She crawled over Asami’s body so she could hop off the bed. She started toward her closet, pulling out her jackets and gloves.</p><p>Asami rubbed her eyes sleepily, looking over at Korra in confusion. “Korra, what time is it? What is going on?”</p><p>Korra sighed and started pulling on her boots over her thick socks. “I think one of the polar bear dogs is hurt. I’ve been hearing them cry all night. We need to go help them.”</p><p>Asami cocked her head, unsure, but went to put on her coat and boots anyway. “Didn’t your dad say they were dangerous?”</p><p>Korra smiled cheekily and helped Asami into her warm clothes. “It’s okay, I have an idea. I’m going to bring some fish jerky with me.”</p><p>Asami wrinkled her brow and chewed her lip, but followed Korra out to the main room of the igloo anyway. “I don’t know Korra. This sounds dangerous.”</p><p>Korra ignored her at first, rooting around the kitchen until she found what she needed. “Trust me. We will be fine!”</p><p>“Okay.” Asami agreed, and allowed Korra to pull her outside to the tundra.</p><p>They started howling as soon as they were outside until they heard one back, and started toward the sound.</p><p>Eventually, they came across a small pup walking around in circles, howling occasionally.</p><p>“Look, Asami! Over there, she’s just a baby and she’s all alone!” Korra immediately leapt up from where they were crouched down and started to run toward the pup, until Asami grabbed her shoulder.</p><p>“Korra, wait! You have to approach slowly or she’ll run away.” Asami reminded her, and Korra nodded back at her in understanding, slowing her pace and dragging Asami with her. As they got closer to the animal, their breathing became heavier to the point they were almost panting.</p><p>When they were about ten feet away, the polar bear pup noticed the two girls and started letting out a low growl. Asami jumped back in fear, but Korra just grabbed the fish jerky from her pocket and held it out in front of her.</p><p>“Hey there, are you lost? It’s okay, we’re friendly!” The pup continued growling, but stopped backing away. Korra beamed at her and pushed the fish jerky further away from her toward the pup. “Do you like fish jerky?”</p><p>Asami’s breath hitched as pup walked slowly toward the fish jerky, sniffing as he got closer.</p><p>“I think she’s really hungry, Korra.” Asami commented, the pup grabbed the fish jerky with his teeth and finished it quickly.</p><p>Their eyes widened and looked at each other, before smiling in relief as the pup whined and settled back down into the snow. Korra extended a shaky hand until she reached the soft nose, and started petting the pup while she nuzzled into her hand.</p><p>“Asami, come pet her she’s sweet.”</p><p>As Asami scratched behind her ears, Korra fell backwards letting out a howl and laughing as she fell.</p><p>Soon, however, Asami realized the snow storm had gotten worse, and looked at Korra with worry.</p><p>“Korra, how do we get home?” She asked, pulling Korra from where she had flopped on her back with her tongue out, trying to imitate the little polar bear.</p><p>Korra looked around, chewing on her cheek and pondering what to do. When Korra didn’t answer her quickly enough, Asami started panicking, her chest heaving as she started to cry. Korra jumped up, pulling Asami into a hug.</p><p>“It’s okay! We can camp out here.” She nudged Asami and smirked.</p><p>She took a deep breath and tried to concentrate on what Master Katara had taught her in the few lessons she had.</p><p>Using sharp, but clumsy movements, Korra constructed a small igloo.</p><p>Asami tentatively approached the sloppy igloo and crouched so she could look inside.</p><p>“It’s safe. I promise. C’mon, Naga let’s head inside.” Korra got on her hands and knees, crawling into the structure she created. Asami followed, blowing her hair out of her face so she could see where she was going.</p><p>“Naga? Is that what you’re going to name her?” Asami asked, curling her body around herself to try and stay warm.</p><p>Extending her hand, Korra signaled to the polar bear dog to follow her in. Hesitantly, Naga followed, padding her big paws until she was curled up.</p><p>Korra slid backwards until her head was resting on Naga’s side, using the fluffy animal as a pillow.</p><p>“Yep. Naga. She’s gonna be my new best friend. After you, of course.” Korra smiled.</p><p>Asami grinned, moving over so she could hug Korra while also laying against Naga.</p><p>Shutting her eyes, Asami started to fall asleep, with Korra following in her footsteps shortly after.</p><p>The next morning, when their parents found them, screaming about how irresponsible they were and how they could have been seriously hurt, the two girls couldn’t help thinking that there was no way they could be hurt as long as they had the other with them.</p>
<hr/><p>“This is the main training course. I can only do the first part of it right now, but I’m getting better at it.” Korra gestured up at the ropes course towering above them, before pulling Asami toward the building at the side.</p><p>“This is where Naga will sleep when she’s older. She’s not quite fully grown yet, so she still sleeps in my room. I think she should be able to sleep there always- I mean they moved me here for my protection, right? Isn’t Naga just additional protection?”</p><p>Asami laughed, and then sighed, looking over at the excited look at her best friend’s face. It had been almost two years since they had last seen each other, but the second they were together again it was like they had never been apart.</p><p>“It’s really cool, Korra. Do you like living here?”</p><p>Korra kicked a rock on the floor, blushing before she looked away from Asami. “I don’t know. It’s cool being able to practice bending, but it’s like my whole life is just work. There’s always someone constantly watching me and I can’t leave. I miss my friends from my neighborhood- but it took me months of convincing to be able to have you visit. No way would they let anyone else visit.” Korra murmured.</p><p>“I get it. Ever since the attack and my mom dying my dad has had our house staff constantly watching me. It gets really annoying when I’m just trying to hang out with friends and there’s someone watching me. But, honestly,” Asami looked up at Korra, tucking her hair behind her ear, “I’m so scared they’re going to come back I think it’s worth it. I was walking to school with one of my friends a few months ago and I swear I saw someone who looked just like one of the people who killed my mom. It was like I couldn’t breathe and the world came crashing around me. I don’t get scared as often when I know there’s someone around who can help out.”</p><p>Korra put a hand on her shoulder, looking into her eyes. “I wish I lived closer to you. I would walk with you to school everyday and no one would mess with anyone who was best friends with the Avatar.”</p><p>Asami rolled her eyes and pushed her away playfully. “Yeah, right, Korra. You might be the Avatar but you’re still seven.” She mocked. “Plus, I’m way taller than you. It would probably be me protecting you, if anything.”</p><p>Korra gaped in mock offense. “Excuse you, I am going to be trained by the best benders in the world. I can absolutely protect you. Plus! I’m not done growing yet, I might be taller than you one day.”</p><p>Asami let out a loud laugh, letting her head fall back. “Sure, sure. Anyway, speaking of training, my dad enrolled me in self-defense and martial arts class. Next year, when I come down here, we’re going to spar. And I am going to beat you.”</p><p>Korra’s eyes widened in excitement, pulling Asami to one of the training grounds. “You’re on, Sato. But since I’m so nice, why don’t I teach you what I know now.”</p><p>Korra crouched down, showing Asami a pose that Master Katara had taught her and Asami giggled. She didn’t want to go this long without seeing Korra ever again.</p>
<hr/><p>
  <em>Dear Korra,</em>
</p><p>
  <em>In my class right now, we are learning about letter writings. We are writing to students at another school. My pen-pal seems nice, but I realized-- why not write to my best friend?</em>
</p><p>
  <em>My teacher says my handwriting is terrible, but I can read it fine, so I don’t know what she’s talking about. I don’t like writing class that much anyway. I love math and science, but don’t see why I have to learn how to write well. Isn’t that why they invented type-writers?</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Anyway, I’m still enrolled in my martial arts classes. My teacher says I am a natural. She used to be a part of the Kyoshi Warriors, who we learned about in history class. My dad says she is one of the best instructors in the world, and she used to know the past Avatar! I told her my best friend is the current Avatar, and that she needs to train me so I can beat you when we next see each other!</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Miss you!</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Asami</em>
</p><p>…</p><p>
  <em>Asami,</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I’ve never written a letter before! This will be my first time writing one. It’s cool that you’re in school, I just get taught by members of the white lotus, but it gets pretty boring. I don’t know why I need to know about Avatar Yangchen’s animal guide, but they say it’s important. Whatever.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>All my classes are about Avatar business. I don’t really get to learn a lot about science or math. You’re gonna be way smarter than me. Some of the Avatar stuff is cool, though. I really like learning about Avatar Aang and the adventures he had with his friends, and sometimes Master Katara tells me funny stories about things they did as kids. It’s weird imagining her as a kid-- did you know she and Avatar Aang once blew up a Fire Nation Factory all by themselves? I can’t wait until I am trained so I can go do things like that. Of course, I hope you will be with me.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>My favorite Avatar is probably Avatar Kyoshi, though. The white lotus says one day I should be able to get in contact with my past lives, and I am very excited to talk to Avatar Kyoshi. As you are being trained by a Kyoshi Warrior, maybe you can talk to her too. I’m not sure how that whole thing works yet.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Miss you, too!</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Korra</em>
</p><p>
  <em>P.S.- I am going to kick your butt when we next meet.</em>
</p>
<hr/><p>“You ready, Sato?” Korra smiled, facing her opponent on the training mat.</p><p>Asami let out a breath, which was visible in the freezing cold air. She nodded, and Korra immediately started charging toward her. Asami easily stepped out of the way, sticking her foot out so that it tripped Korra, who tumbled over. Asami pounced on top of her and smirked. “I thought you said you were gonna kick my butt, Korra?” She mocked.</p><p>Korra growled and flipped them over. “No fair! You cheated!” She stood up and folded her arms over her chest and pouted, to which Asami laughed.</p><p>“I didn’t cheat, you’re just easy to read. So I beat you, fair and square.” Asami taunted her. “What was it you said last time? ‘Because I’m so nice, I’ll teach you what I know.’ Well, because I’m so nice, I’ll let you have a rematch.”</p><p>Korra got back into position, and quickly started charging at Asami again, who once again tipped Korra on her back. Asami laughed in earnest this time, and Korra just groaned at her loss.</p><p>Another voice drew them away from where they were sparring. “Asami is right, Korra. You are too easy to read and too brash while you fight. You could learn a thing or two from Asami about being dynamic while you fight.”</p><p>At seeing the elderly water-bender, both girls stood up straight up and bowed in respect.</p><p>“Hi Master Katara! It’s great to see you again!” Asami, running up to greet her with a hug. Korra walked up slower, still rubbing her neck with the embarrassment of her loss.</p><p>“It’s great to see you too, Asami. Maybe you can finally get across to our Korra here that there is more to battle than just brute strength.”</p><p>Korra rolled her eyes. “Yeah, yeah. I’ve heard it all before.” Despite her annoyance, Katara pulled her into the hug with her and Asami, keeping the girls in a tight group hug.</p><p>Asami giggled as Korra tried to wriggle free of Katara’s grip, but she was no match for her strength. Eventually, however, Katara let them go free and Korra breathed heavily dramatically, as if she was suffocating under her grasp.</p><p>“Now, I think Senna was looking for you two to start helping with dinner, but how about after dinner I show you girls some moves. Korra, maybe you can even beat Asami.” Asami’s eyes lit up at the idea, but Korra just glowered and pouted.</p><p>Before she could respond, Asami was dragging her up the stairs into the building so they could help with dinner. “Thanks Katara! That sounds great!” She yelled behind her, while Korra just complained into her ear.</p><p>Katara shook her head at the two girls, watching them run away.</p>
<hr/><p>
  <em>Korra!</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Happy birthday! You’re now ten! Do you feel old? When I turned ten I felt super old. Something about hitting double digits changes you.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I wish I was there to celebrate with you, but I should be back down there in a few months.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>My dad has been kinda weird lately about allowing me back down South to see you. I don’t know what’s going on but lately he has been all about safety and for some reason he doesn’t think me going down there will be safe. He’s been really busy with all these new contracts, so maybe he is just stressed.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Write back soon,</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Asami</em>
</p><p>…</p><p><br/>
<em>Asami,</em>
</p><p>
  <em>My birthday was really fun! Katara’s brother and his husband came down South and celebrated with us. Her brother is really sick and they don’t think he has much time left in him, so it was good to see him again. I’m pretty sad about it because he was basically another grandparent to me, but while he was here he taught me some stuff about sword fighting and his husband gave me a small lesson in firebending. I’m not meant to be learning that yet but Katara said it was fine. I think if Katara said it wasn’t fine they still would have done it, anyway.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I think I would have felt old if I hadn’t spent my birthday with the elderly. Not that I don’t love them, but it’s hard to feel old when all your friends remember a time before cars.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I’m sorry to hear about your dad. Do you want me to go mess with the drills so he has to come down south? Just kidding (kinda).</em>
</p><p>
  <em>How is school going? Are your friends being nice to you? I miss you so much, Asami.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Korra</em>
</p>
<hr/><p>“This is the sword Sokka left me. I don’t really know how to use it, but I like keeping it in my room. I really miss him.” Korra sighed, running her finger lightly over the handle.</p><p>“I’m sorry, Korra. I wish I got to meet him.” Asami expressed, rubbing her hand along Korra’s arm trying to soothe her.</p><p>Korra looked at her, tears starting to well up in her eyes. “You would have really liked him. He would have been so impressed that you could beat me up.” She laughed and Asami laughed alongside her.</p><p>“I have your late birthday present, though!” Asami cheered. She had only arrived at the Southern Water Tribe a few hours ago, and now they were finally alone getting Asami’s stuff set up in Korra’s room.</p><p>Korra smiled, jumping on the bed and holding out her hands in expectation.</p><p>Shyly, Asami grabbed the (very carefully) wrapped present from her bag. She handed it to Korra, who immediately started ripping the paper away.</p><p>“Careful, Korra!” Asami laughed, to which the Avatar sheepishly blushed at.</p><p>Inside the paper, Korra found a homemade photo frame covered in stickers and glitter. The frame held a sepia photo of Asami and Korra piled over a baby Naga. They both had big smiles on their face while Naga had her tongue sticking out. Korra smiled at the image and looked at Asami with shock.</p><p>“Where did you get this photo?” She asked incredulously.</p><p>Asami beamed. “I’m sure you remember when you somehow convinced me to go out into the tundra with you and we found Naga.” Korra grinned at the memory. “Well, apparently after our parents stopped threatening to kill us over doing something so stupid, they found time to take us to a photo studio to commemorate it. I found it while I was going through my Mom’s stuff a while ago, and I decorated the frame myself. I thought, as we have to be apart all the time, that it might be nice to y’know, have a picture of us…” Her voice started to trail off, becoming nervous.</p><p>Korra didn’t say anything back, instead just looking at the photo.</p><p>“Do you not like it? I can get you something else if-”</p><p>Before Asami could finish, Korra looked at her with tears streaming down her face and pulled her into a hug.</p><p>“Asami, I love it. I really, really love it. This is the best gift ever.” Korra choked out. Asami smiled, and leaned into the hug.</p><p>“Are you sure?” Asami tugged on her hair nervously, a trait she had picked up after spending so much time with Korra.</p><p>“No, really it’s amazing.” Korra sighed, picking the picture frame back up into her hands and gently stroking the outline of her baby face. “It’s like-- I love my parents and Katara and Sokka and Zuko. But I wish I could have had you celebrate with me. No one understands me like you do, ‘Sami.” She sighed.</p><p>Asami gripped her hand. “I’m so glad you’re my best friend, Korra.”</p><p>Korra smiled at her. “We’ll always be best friends. I promise you that.”</p>
<hr/><p>
  <em>Korra,</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I’m going to a Pro-bending game this weekend! One of my friend’s dad has season tickets, and they’re great seats!</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Do you remember when we listened to the games on the radio together? When you eventually come and visit me, we have to go to a game. I don’t know the rules on the Avatar playing in Pro-bending games, but I think you would be great at it.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>During the game, I’m going to yell really loudly at a quiet part. Maybe the radio will pick it up? Let me know if you hear it!</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Asami</em>
</p><p>…</p><p>
  <em>Asami,</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I am so jealous! I’ve wanted to see a Pro-bending game forever.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I think the Avatar should be able to compete. I’ll even be on a team by myself. I’d still kick everyone’s butts.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I didn’t hear your voice when I listened to the radio, maybe it’s just a bad radio.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I can’t wait until I can one day visit Republic City!</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Korra.</em>
</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
When Asami is thirteen, her dad has <em>officially</em> become weird. He’s so awkward all the time and so protective. It becomes suffocating, and so confusing. He won’t let her have friends over unless he is home, and it took her <em>months</em> of convincing to let her go see Korra again.</p><p>But eventually she does, and she has never been more grateful to be spread across Korra’s bed while she reads her facts about her past lives.</p><p>She glances over at Korra, who had her long, brown hair pulled into her signature three ponytail look. There was something in Asami’s tummy that felt strange this time. It was like every time she looked at Korra she was seeing her for the first time. She chalked it up to her stress over her dad, but there was <em>something</em> off.</p><p>Korra looked over at her, giving that half grin that made Asami’s stomach flip.</p><p>“So-- what do you think?”</p><p>Asami shook her head, realizing she hadn’t been listening to what Korra hadn’t been saying. Her cheeks became red as she asked Korra to repeat herself.</p><p>However, Korra only laughed. “Do you think I could take on Avatar Kuruk in a fight?”</p><p>Asami wrinkled her brow, trying to figure out what to say. “Hm...well right now you have only mastered one element, but you’re proficient in earth bending. Maybe not right now, but in the future I feel that you could!”</p><p>Korra looked upset at the answer. “Nah! I could totally take him on now.” Asami rolled her eyes as Korra stood up, offering her hand to Asami.</p><p>“Wanna go on a ride with Naga? There’s this cool spot I wanna show you.” Korra asked, not really waiting for an answer as she started to walk out the door. It’s not like she needed to wait, she knew Asami would agree.</p><p>They saddled Naga quickly and Asami took the chance to rub Naga’s nose, nuzzling her with her own face.</p><p>“Nice to see you again, Naga.” Naga whimpered in agreement.</p><p>Korra hopped on Naga’s back and dropped her hand down so she could help Asami up. Somewhere inside, she told herself that Asami didn’t need help getting up on Naga but she ignored it.</p><p>Asami wrapped her arms around Korra’s back and Korra felt her cheeks become warm. They started walking toward the gate, and she signaled to the guard that she was taking Naga out for a walk. As they started galloping in earnest, Asami pushed her face into Korra’s back so she wouldn’t face the full front of the cold air. Despite the cold, Korra’s hands became sweaty, her blush never fading from her face.</p><p>They didn’t talk much on the ride over. It was too cold at the speed they were going and Korra was so nervous she assumed anything she could say would come out garbled.</p><p>When they neared the cliff, Korra tugged on Naga so she would slow down.</p><p>Korra jumped off Naga and, once again, offered Asami help as she got down.</p><p>“Korra, this is beautiful! Asami commented. They were stopped at a cliff that looked over the frozen bay, with mountains sprouting up in the distant horizons.</p><p>Korra smiled. “I’m glad you like it! I’ve been wanting to show it to you since I found it.”</p><p>Asami dropped down at the edge of the cliff, swinging her legs back and forth, watching the waves crash against the ice far below her. Korra came to sit next to her, and Asami had to calm herself. They always sat this close together, <em>why was it bothering her this much now?</em></p><p>“I’ve really missed you lately, Korra. Things are really weird at home and people at school are becoming strange too. One of my friends already has a boyfriend-- how gross is that?” Asami chuckled, sticking her tongue out in disgust.</p><p>“Super gross.” Korra agreed, looking away so Asami couldn’t see her blush.</p><p>“Right? And they’re always kissing and stuff. I hate seeing it.” Asami pouted, looking down at her lap. “I think this one boy at school likes me. He listens to me when I talk about cars and stuff and is always walking home with me. He tries to sit with me at lunch but he eats kinda loud so I try to eat with my friends anyway.”</p><p>Korra still wouldn’t look at her. “I listen to you when you talk about cars.” She mumbled, frowning.</p><p>Tentatively, Asami grabbed Korra’s hand, and with her cheeks burning up, she leaned over and kissed Korra’s cheek.</p><p>Korra spluttered, and this time Asami looked embarrassed.</p><p>“Sorry! I shouldn’t have done that.. You just looked sad.” She muttered, attempting to get up from the cliff and walk back to Naga.</p><p>Korra pulled her back down, turning her face to look at her.</p><p>“No, no it’s okay. I was just surprised. I um...I liked it.” She blushed.</p><p>Slowly, Asami glanced up at Korra staring at her lips. She pulled her eyes to look into hers, and cupped Korra’s cheek with her hand.</p><p>“Can I-?”</p><p>“Yeah.”</p><p>They were cold, the wind was harsh blowing behind them, and their lips were chapped, but as they pressed their lips together, lightly and innocently, they both couldn’t imagine a better first kiss.</p><p>Eventually, and unwillingly, they pulled back and laughed at themselves before leaning in to kiss again.</p><p>They didn’t talk about what kissing meant over the next few weeks of the trip. Occasionally, when no one was looking they would hold each other’s hand, and when they were sure they were in private they would steal more kisses from each other. Neither of them wanted to ask what it meant, they simply wanted to enjoy the time they had with each other.</p><p>The day Asami is meant to leave, Korra pulls her to a corner area of the compound and kisses Asami one last time as they giggle together.</p><p>“We’re still going to write to each other, right?” Korra asked, her blue eyes vulnerable.</p><p>“Of course, nothing has changed between us. Best friends forever.” Asami smiled, pulling Korra to her lips again.</p><p>Neither of them noticed Hiroshi in the distance, who had decided that he had to prevent his daughter from seeing the Avatar once and for all, before things got more dangerous.</p>
<hr/><p>
  <em>Hey Asami,</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I haven’t heard from you in a while. I don’t know if you got my letters or if something happened but I’m starting to get worried.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I started firebending training today, but I don’t really have much to update you on after my last few letters.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I’d really appreciate it if you could write back to me. I hope I didn’t ruin anything.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Miss you,</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Korra</em>
</p><p>…</p><p><br/>
<em>Korra,</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I understand you’re probably really busy with learning firebending (I think you mentioned you were starting soon while I was last there), but I really miss you. I’m starting to wonder if the post office is messing something up with our letters, because my dad says he hasn’t changed anything with how he usually stamps and sends them off.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I wish I could be with you again. I miss kissing you, but I really just miss talking to you. I want to tell you about what’s going on in my life.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Please write back to me!</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Asami</em>
</p><p>
  <em>P.S.- How is Naga?</em>
</p><p>…</p><p>
  <em>Asami,</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I really don’t have many friends. I’m not super good at the whole friendship thing but I really don’t know what I could have done wrong to make you stop writing to me.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I’m afraid I messed everything up by kissing you. If it means we can go back to being friends, I promise I’ll never kiss you again.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Korra.</em>
</p><p>…</p><p>
  <em>Korra,</em>
</p><p>
  <em>You know, if you don’t want to be friends anymore you could just tell me. I think it’s really rude to just stop talking to me, especially after what we did on my last trip.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I’m not writing to you anymore. If you want to write to me again, let me know, but you’ll have a lot of explaining to do.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Asami</em>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Push away the ones you should've held close</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>So here is where the story really starts. We have a time jump and now we are where season 1 begins. </p><p>It's gonna be angsty for a few chapters. Asami and Korra both think the other person abandoned them and neither are going to trust the other at first. I promise you, however, they will end up happy together-- it just might take a while. </p><p>The chapter of this title is from Bet On It from High School Musical bc the idea of Korra angrily re-enacting that makes me laugh.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <strong>Four Years Later</strong>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She was slouched against Naga, trying to get some sleep before they docked at Republic City. The water below rocked the boat back and forth, and it would be comforting if her emotions were not currently fluctuating violently between nervousness and excitement. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>For the first time in her life, Korra was finally free. She was out of the compound and on her way to learn the last of the four elements with Tenzin.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra wasn’t often anxious, and she didn’t like the feeling in her stomach as the boat pulled closer and closer to Republic City. She told herself it was because she was in a new place, so different from anywhere she had ever been before, and that she had to master airbending, but she knew it was also for other reasons. </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
    <br/>
  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Somewhere in the city, Asami was here. She reasoned with herself that Republic City was huge and there was no way she would run into her, but Republic City was full of the various inventions of Future Industries. Korra thought the first time she heard someone mention Sato-mobiles she would throw up. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>When she last saw Asami, they had promised each other they would always be friends (and Korra assumed they had both wanted to be something more) but Asami had abandoned her. Korra wrote her fifty-six letters (she counted) over six months before she finally accepted that Asami was not going to write back to her. It was humiliating running to the guards each day, asking if a letter had been dropped off for her only for them to tell her “Nope! Your best friend hates you and it’s probably your fault!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>At least, that’s what it felt like. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Suddenly, the boat sloshed up against what she assumed was the dock, and soon the door opened. Naga stood up carefully, trying to find her footing to get off the boat while Korra closed her eyes at the sudden, bright light, blinking until she was adjusted. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“C’mon Naga! Let’s go!” She jumped on top of her best friend--her actual best friend, who would never abandon her-- and raced into the city. Seeing how large the city truly was, Korra didn’t think she would have any issue forgetting about Asami. </span>
</p><hr/><p> </p><p>
  <span>She thinks she likes Mako. She thinks she likes Mako </span>
  <em>
    <span>a lot. </span>
  </em>
  <span>She likes that he’s a bit of an asshole and doesn’t just fawn over her, like every other person does when they find out she’s the Avatar. She likes sparring with him in the practice rooms as he teaches her the rules of Pro-bending. She likes the way she feels like </span>
  <em>
    <span>Korra </span>
  </em>
  <span>around him rather than </span>
  <em>
    <span>the Avatar, </span>
  </em>
  <span>she hasn’t felt that way with anyone in a long time. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It’s nice, having that connection with someone again. She tries not to think about the last time she had a connection like this. She almost succeeds. </span>
</p><p> </p><hr/><p>
  <span>“Haha!” She cheered, watching as Bolin toppled over when she hit him with a water whip. She pumped her arms in the air, gloating at how easily she knocked him over. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“That was good, Korra!” He commented, slowly standing up again and rubbing his back. They met in the middle to high-five. Her first Pro-bending match had been messy, but she finally was getting in the groove of things. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Where’s Mako at? He’s never been this late to practice before.” Korra asked, shifting her weight onto her left side. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Bolin rolled his eyes and groaned. “There’s some girl. She bumped into him on her moped, like, a week ago and they’ve spent a ton of time together since. He said he was gonna bring her to come meet us.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra’s heart dropped into her stomach. “Mako has...a girlfriend?” She asked, trying(and failing) not to make her disappointment apparent on her face. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Maybe? I don’t know if they’re official yet. But he’s obsessed with her. It’s all I’ve been hearing about.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra scurried to gather her things. She had to get out of here before Mako arrived. She hadn’t liked anyone as much as she liked Mako since, well, Asami, and she was sure that this rejection would actually kill her. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hey, where are you going?” Bolin asked, confused. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra kept packing her bag, starting to jog out the door. Her face was panicked as she tried to come up with some sort of explanation.  “I just remembered Tenzin needed me for something back at-” Her explanation was cut off when she walked head first into Mako’s chest. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh, uh, hi Mako. I gotta head out!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Wait! Korra, I want you to meet my girlfriend.” Mako pushed back at her, preventing her from leaving</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra sighed and turned back to the practice room. There was no escaping this. She would just have to meet whatever pretty girl Mako was now dating and pretend she didn’t hate her guts. The confirmation that they were now official didn’t help matters, either. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She sat next to Bolin, unable to keep a pout off her face. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Korra, Bolin. I want you to meet my girlfriend, Asami.” From behind the door walked the </span>
  <em>
    <span>one </span>
  </em>
  <span>person Korra did not want to see. If her heart was in her stomach before, it was now fully in her shoes. Her black hair had gotten longer and shinier(if that was even possible), her face had matured with age, and she had gotten taller. A lot taller. </span>
  <em>
    <span> How was she still taller than her? </span>
  </em>
  <span>Her eyes were still the same, however. The same green eyes that felt like home, that were her safety net for so many years. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She couldn’t breathe. She had to get out of here and now. Maybe she would wake up and this would all be a terrible nightmare. She was hallucinating. She had been possessed. She had finally cracked under the stress the Amon situation was giving her. This wasn’t real. This couldn’t be real. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Korra?” Asami whispered. She looked like she was about to cry. Korra couldn’t handle this, she had to go. She got up, trying desperately to not look like her heart had shattered into a million pieces, grabbing her stuff and heading toward the door. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Wait, do you guys know each other?” Mako asked, confused. He turned, trying to grab Korra’s arm to prevent her leaving but she just shook him off and continued walking. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No. We don’t know each other.” Korra didn’t even turn back to look at them, stalking out of the room like her life depended on it. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami sucked in a deep breath, shaking the beginning of her tears away and forcing her face to become unreadable. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Keep calm, keep calm. There’s nothing wrong. You are in control. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Mako and Bolin looked at each other- what just happened?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>…</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Bolin left the room awkwardly at Mako’s suggestion, leaving the young couple to themselves. He debated following Korra, but he was sure she was already halfway to Air Temple Island by this point.  The singed shoe marks leading the way out of the stadium only confirmed that Korra likely didn’t want to talk. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Mako pushed his hair back in stress. If he knew introducing his teammates to his girlfriend would end up like this he never would have suggested it. But he had been telling Asami about their cool new teammate for the last few days and Asami </span>
  <em>
    <span>loved </span>
  </em>
  <span>Pro-bending. He had just assumed she would love meeting the team and </span>
  <em>
    <span>especially </span>
  </em>
  <span>the Avatar. How the Hell did this happen? </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Asami, what’s wrong?” He placed a hand on Asami’s shoulder, trying to pull her from where she was still in the depths of her thoughts. He felt momentarily frustrated that he, once again, couldn’t tell what Asami was thinking. Her breathing was still rapid, but her head was hung down, preventing him from seeing her face. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She snapped her head up, looking at Mako with her now bloodshot eyes. “You couldn’t have mentioned that your new teammate was the fucking Avatar?” He had never seen Asami like this, angry and passionate. Even when she is upset, like when they are stuck in slow traffic and she just wants to go </span>
  <em>
    <span>fast, </span>
  </em>
  <span>she always remains cool and collected. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Mako started backing up. “Woah, hey! Don’t be mad at me. I thought you would be excited. How was I supposed to know you have some sort of personal beef with her? You’ve literally never mentioned her.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami composed herself, tuning her body quickly around and making her way to the exit. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m going home. I’ll see you later, Mako.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Asami, wait! I want to talk about this.” He grabbed her arm, his eyes begging her to stay. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She glanced to the floor and bit her lip. “I need some time alone right now, Mako. My whole world just got rocked.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I wish you would just tell me whatever’s going on, or whatever has happened, between you and Korra. I wanna be there for you.” He walked closer, so they were almost touching. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I will, sometime. It just hurts to talk about right now. I promise I’ll call you tonight?” She leant up to kiss him on the cheek and walk out of the room. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Asami, I don’t have a phone.” He said, but she was already out of the room. “Whatever.” He mumbled, sitting down on one of the benches to pout. </span>
</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra let out another breath of fire, contorting her body into a backflip. She couldn’t figure out what to do with her frustration, and after swimming multiple laps around the island that </span>
  <em>
    <span>still </span>
  </em>
  <span>didn’t help, she decided to run over the fire bending forms she had learned. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It wasn’t helping, of course it wasn’t. If anything it was making her more frustrated because it reminded her of the block she was having with air bending. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She punched the ground and finally slumped below a tree, letting herself think for the first time since she saw Asami. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Asami. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Why was she here? Why did Korra have to see her? Why is she dating Mako? Why does she still feel something for Mako? And, damn it, why does she still feel something for Asami?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She gripped her head, feeling like it was going to explode. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Korra? Are you okay?” She popped her head up when she heard the small voice, seeing Jinora looking worried only a few feet away. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She sighed. “Yeah, Jinora. I’m fine.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jinora hesitated. “Are you sure? You looked really upset. This isn’t about airbending, right?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra laughed bitterly. She wished this was just about airbending. “No, Jinora. It’s not about airbending.” She sighed, debating whether she should open up to her. Of all the airbending children, Jinora was least likely to blab, and most likely to just listen. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It’s this guy. I think...I think I like him. But now he’s dating this other girl, and I’m just feeling super frustrated about it. I’m so bad at this whole romance thing.” She sighed and looked at her lap, her mind racing until Jinora sat down next to her and started rubbing her bicep. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Korra, if you’re that upset because he’s dating another girl, I think you might more-than-like him.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra grimaced. “You’re right. I don’t even know why I’m denying it anymore.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jinora still looked worried. “Is that all this is really about?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Of course Jinora would be able to tell she’s keeping information from her, the girl was one step away from being a mind reader. She wasn’t sure how much she wanted to tell Jinora— she wasn’t sure how much she could admit to herself— but she rested her head in her hands and kept talking. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I kind of have an, I don’t know, history with this girl? I wasn’t expecting to ever have to see her again and now she’s dating the boy I like. It’s just all such a mess.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Have you tried talking to her?” Jinora asked innocently. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Chuckling darkly, Korra hit her head against the tree. “No. I walked out. I don’t have anything to say to her. I don’t want to hear anything she has to say to me. I don’t think there is anything she could say to fix it.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I don’t know about that, Korra. Things can often be a misunderstanding.” Jinora paused, waiting to see if Korra would respond, but when she didn’t she continued. “You should at least talk to Mako about it. He might feel the same way.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra looked at her in surprise. “How did you know it was Mako?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You’re easy to read, Korra.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra rolled her eyes. She wished that was the first time she had heard that. She wished she wasn’t thinking about how Asami had said that. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m going to go take a shower. I think I need to wash this day off me. Thanks for talking with me, Jinora.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The young airbender smiled at her as she walked away. Korra mentally slapped herself. She had to get herself together. </span>
</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You really are the best girlfriend ever!” Mako exclaimed, flopping back on Asami’s bed. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Well, you’re my favorite Pro-bending team, and when I told my dad that you guys were short for the championship, he was more than happy to help out!” She laughed, falling down on the bed next to him and laying her head on his chest. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The past couple days had been </span>
  <em>
    <span>rough. </span>
  </em>
  <span>After the whole Korra situation, Asami had ignored Mako for a day. Actually, she had ignored everyone, choosing to spend the whole day deep in her closet, looking through the box of letters she still kept in there.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She couldn’t figure out her feelings on the matter. She was angry that Korra, who never took the time to write back to her, was suddenly in the city. She was sad remembering the friendship they lost. She was jealous knowing that Mako was teammates with Korra, and worried that she might lose him to her. In the mix of all those emotions, there was also a glimmer of happiness, of relief. She had spent the last four years wondering what on earth happened to Korra- whether something had caused her harm or if she was in danger. Despite how furious she was, she couldn’t help that the first thing she felt when seeing her again was comfort in knowing she was okay and delight in seeing her best friend’s face again. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Former </span>
  </em>
  <span>best friend, she had to keep reminding herself. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She and Mako had talked it out, kind of. She told him that she and Korra used to be friends but aren’t anymore. He had pressed her for more information, but she couldn’t bring herself to talk about it any more than that. What did it matter, anyway, it happened so long ago. Korra is completely different now, she knew a different person back then. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He seemed to forget about it when she brought him to meet her dad, however.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Now, curled up on his chest all she had to think about was her boyfriend. She absolutely did not have to think about how, by funding the Fire Ferrets, she was ensuring she would have to keep seeing Korra. She didn’t have to think about having to explain to her father, the father she cried to when Korra stopped talking to her, that he was now supporting her Pro-bending team. She didn’t have to think about all the times she and Korra talked about Pro-bending games, and how one day she would take Korra to a game. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She didn’t have to think about any of that. She just had to think about her boyfriend. Her sweet, kind, aloof boyfriend who-</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“So I have something I want to ask you.” Mako brought her out of her train of thought, drawing her eyes to meet his. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hm?” She responded, closing her eyes once again and snuggling up to him, listening to the soft </span>
  <em>
    <span>thump </span>
  </em>
  <span>of his heartbeat.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He took a deep breath. “So, uh, I don’t know if your dad has already mentioned this to you but Tarrlok is throwing a gala this weekend. He’s, uh, he’s trying to get Korra to join his task force so he’s throwing a gala for her.” She sat straight up and scowled, she was about to say something back but he waved his hands, gesturing for her to let him finish. “I know, I know. But, like, obviously I’m going and I was wondering if you wanted to go with me? We wouldn’t have to even talk to Korra and your dad is going to be there. I just thought it might be a fun excuse to get dressed up and go on a date.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami debated how she wanted to respond. On one hand, that sounded like the worst thing ever. On the other hand, Mako seemed like he was really excited, and she had a new dress she wanted to wear. He was smiling sheepishly and her mind was made up. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Okay. I’ll go. I have to get used to being in the same room with Korra again anyway if I want to keep supporting the Fire Ferrets.” She grinned at him, leaning up to kiss him once again and he met her lips enthusiastically. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She could be around Korra again. It was just a shock the first time, that’s all. It’s not like she has feelings for her anymore. </span>
</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>
  <span>She </span>
  <em>
    <span>hated </span>
  </em>
  <span>Tarrlok, she </span>
  <em>
    <span>hated </span>
  </em>
  <span>this gala, and she </span>
  <em>
    <span>hated </span>
  </em>
  <span>not being able to wear her normal clothes. This was, quite possibly, the worst night of her life-- and that was including the night that she saw Amon take someone’s bending away. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Okay, maybe that was an exaggeration. She hoped this night wouldn’t give her recurring nightmares for the next several weeks, but with the amount of smalltalk she was doing today, it was beginning to feel like she was </span>
  <em>
    <span>living </span>
  </em>
  <span>in a nightmare. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She had never been to a real party before-- her parents, Katara, and some of the nicer guards of the White Lotus celebrating her birthday with her doesn’t count-- but she expected it to be a lot more fun than this. Where was the dancing, the laughter, the friends? She was pretty sure parties were meant to include that. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>At this point, she would even just take seeing a friend. She hadn’t seen Mako and Bolin in a few days, and it had made her realize just how much she had bonded with them in the last few weeks. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It was nice to have friends aside from Naga again. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She felt like she had finally had a moment to think when Tarrlok came up to her, talking about how she had to meet someone. She rolled her eyes but let him drag her along. The quicker she spoke to everyone Tarrlok wanted her to, the sooner she would be able to duck out of here and hang out with Naga for the rest of the night. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>But, of course, Tarrlok had to introduce her to someone she already knew. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Korra, it is my pleasure to introduce you to Republic CIty’s most famous industrialist, Hiroshi Sato.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra smiled sheepishly at him, raising a singular hand as a greeting. He was older now, too, but she still recognized him as the man she used to see every year or so. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hi, Mr. Sato. It’s nice to see you again.” She said, timidly.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>To her surprise, Hiroshi smiled at her, pulling her into a hug. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It’s great to see you again, Korra.” Korra smiled nervously, unsure how to act around the man who was essentially family for multiple years. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You already know each other?” Tarrlok asked, reminding Korra that he was unfortunately still here. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’ve known Korra since she was a toddler. Her father helped me with business matters down in the Southern Water Tribe.” Hiroshi explained. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Before Tarrlok could respond, another voice pulled her away. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hey! Korra!” Her face lit up at the familiar voice, seeing her two best friends walk toward her. She reached her arms up to pull both Mako and Bolin in a hug. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>As she did, Mako whispered into her ear, “Don’t freak out, okay?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra tensed, guessing what was going to happen already. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Hiroshi tugged Asami from out behind Mako and Bolin. Korra’s breath hitched, why did she have to look like </span>
  <em>
    <span>that. </span>
  </em>
  <span>She had finally admitted to herself that she thought Asami looked beautiful at the practice room, but this was on another level. She remembered how soft Asami’s hair is, and would kill to just run her hands-</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Korra, I assume you remember my daughter, Asami.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami looked straight at her, contrasting their previous meeting completely. A small smirk played on Asami’s face and Korra instantly recognized it. It was like they were eight and sparring together again, she was testing her. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra was nothing if not competitive, so she met her gaze with fire in her eyes, refusing to break it. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I remember her.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Bolin laughed nervously at the tension between the two girls. Tarrlok let out a small cough as a reminder that other people were still there. When neither girl changed their expression, Bolin decided to intervene. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hey guys! Why don’t we head outside for some fresh air.” Bolin placed a hand on both the back of Korra and Asami and started heading toward one of the balconies. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Be back here in thirty minutes, Korra, I have a few more people I want you to meet!” Tarrlok yelled at her. She stuck two fingers in the air as a salute to show Tarrlok she understood and allowed Bolin to lead her out of the gala. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Once outside, she walked up to the railing, allowing herself to take a deep breath before turning around to face her friends. Her friends and Asami. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Someone needs to explain to me what’s going on between you guys.” Bolin moaned, exasperated. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra rolled her eyes. “Nothing is going on between us.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Korra and I used to be friends and now we are not. But I am willing to be the bigger person and put our past behind us if it means supporting the Fire Ferrets.” Asami explained, leaning up against Mako. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra felt sick. It was bad enough to be near Asami, did she have to be so close to Mako?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh great, Asami is willing to be the bigger person. Wonderful.” She snapped her head up. “Wait, the Fire Ferrets are over, anyway, we couldn’t get the money for the championship.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I haven’t had a chance to tell you yet,” Mako exclaimed, “Asami’s dad is sponsoring us! We’re still in the championship.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Terrific.” Korra sighed, looking toward her shoe. Now there was no way she was ever getting away from Asami. Isn’t that what Asami wanted, anyway, to not be around Korra?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“C’mon Korra be more excited! We get to play in the championship!” Bolin pulled her in for a bear hug, and the slightest smile appeared on Korra’s face. She pushed him off of her, laughing as Bolin pretended he was hurt by the loss of contact. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Okay, okay. Yeah, that’s exciting.” She agreed, a lopsided grin appearing on her face as she looked at her teammates. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami smiled at her, and she felt her resolve weaken, but almost immediately she became angry again. Why did Asami think she could just betray her and walk into her life again like she did nothing wrong?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Korra, I know things didn’t end well between us. I still don’t know what entirely happened, but I want to support Mako’s team and I think it would just be best if we tried to ignore each other. We can just be acquaintances, passing by each other.” Something on Asami’s face looked pained, but Korra just felt angry. What does she mean that “she didn’t know what entirely happened?” She was the one who stopped talking to her, who abandoned her when she needed her most. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>At Mako’s hopeful gaze, Korra decided it wasn’t the best time to air those grievances. She looked straight at Asami, </span>
  <em>
    <span>could they be acquaintances? </span>
  </em>
  <span>If you had asked her when she was thirteen, she would have said they were soulmates. Two weeks ago she would have said they were strangers. Could there ever be some sort of middle ground between them? The butterflies in her stomach that she felt looking at Asami’s smile told her no, there was no middle ground. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>But she loved the Fire Ferrets, she hadn’t had this much fun in years and she would do whatever it took to keep the team together. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Sure. That’s fine. Acquaintances.” She looked to the floor, her mouth wanting to spill out a million questions. Why did she ignore her? Did she still feel anything that she did back when they were thirteen, stealing kisses from each other? Did she even feel anything back then? A small part of her, a part that Korra tried desperately to quash, wanted to ask if they could just get back to where they once were. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She decided to say nothing. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami rubbed Mako’s arm, pulling his focus to her face. “Let’s go back inside, Mako. I want to get some food.” Asami turned to look at Korra. “It was...nice to see you again, Korra. See you around, I guess.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Wait...Asami!” She turned around, her long hair flipping in front of her face. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Fuck. </span>
  </em>
  <span>She mentally yelled at herself. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Leave it alone, Korra. Acquaintances, you don’t need to be friends. </span>
  </em>
  <span>Her mouth kept forming words despite her brain protesting. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Do you, um, do you want to see Naga again? I know she misses you.” Korra asked sheepishly, mentally berating herself for acting on impulse and not thinking about whether she even </span>
  <em>
    <span>wanted </span>
  </em>
  <span>to bring Asami down to see Naga. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>A smile blossomed on Asami’s face as she dropped Mako’s arm. “Is she here?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra kicked a pebble on the balcony, quickly realizing how stupid she was. “Well, um, no. She’s back at Air Temple Island.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami’s smile weakened, but it was still there. “Bring her to the next game. I miss her too.” She turned around, dragging Mako back into the gala. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra sighed. Why did Asami miss Naga but not miss her?</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. We don't ever talk about it</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Sorry for such a long wait for this chapter! This one really drove me crazy because its so transitional and I had to rewrite it about 4 separate times before I was happy with it. I had to fight my urges to get them together immediately and just forget the past so I can write more fluff, but I promise it's coming. </p><p>Content warning for Makorra in this chapter. I tried to limit it as much as I could but it will be happening (even slightly) in this story.  </p><p>Chapter title is from You and I by Leon, which is a great song if you haven't listened to it!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>She wiped off the beads of sweat that were quickly collecting on her forehead before Mako shot a jet of fire at her that she needed to dodge. She found the inability to use all the elements one of the most frustrating aspects of Pro-bending. If she could fire bend, she could easily just destroy the fire Mako created, but Pro-bending pushed her to test her abilities and rely on multiple ways of fighting. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She threw a ball of water at Mako just before she was hit in the stomach by an earth disk from Bolin, who was hit by Mako’s fire blasts. They all fell back, laughing at their simultaneous defeat.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It’s been great having you at so many back to back practices, Korra.” Mako expressed earnestly. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She smiled at him, “Feels good to be back, although Tarrlok isn’t too happy about my leave of absence.” Korra was confused about how she felt being on Tarrlok’s force. On one hand, she couldn’t ignore the fact that he tricked her into joining him and she didn’t like who Tarrlok was as a person. On the other hand, she was finally doing something useful for the world as the Avatar. She wasn’t hiding at a compound anymore, she was using her years of training to help people. But she missed her friends, and she was thrilled she found the time to practice with them. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Bolin pointed out that she joined the Fire Ferrets first, and she just grinned at him. She liked Bolin. He was sweet and easy to be around. Nothing was complicated with Bolin. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Mako pulled them into a team huddle, and after they exchanged awkward glances between each other he started his speech. “Uhm, it's our first match of the tournament tonight. I know the three of us haven't been a team for very long, but even so, the fire ferrets have never been this good. Are we ready?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Bolin and Korra cheered in agreement, excited for the upcoming match, but the sound of a new set of footprints in the practice room distracted them. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Not quite.” Korra stiffened. “You’ll need these.” Asami held up the new Fire Ferrets uniform proudly. She and Asami had agreed to be acquaintances, but it wasn’t easy and she dreaded when she actually had to see her. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Mako went over to greet her, kissing her on the cheek and Korra couldn’t control her reaction when she heard Asami call him “Sweetie”. Fortunately, Bolin seemed to share her disgust and she smirked at him as they made gagging noises when Asami and Mako started rubbing their noses together. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami tossed the uniforms to Bolin and Korra. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Bolin, I got your measurements from Mako. It should fit perfectly. Korra, I had to guess a bit for yours. Would you mind trying it on to see if I need to have my tailor make any last minute alterations? Mako and I are leaving for our lunch date soon, but I can drop it off on the way if it needs anything.” Asami looked at her, as if she expected her to just put on the uniform right there. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Uh, okay. Can you guys turn around? I don’t want to walk all the way upstairs to the changing room.” Bolin and Mako blushed in embarrassment, but Asami just rolled her eyes. Nevertheless, they all turned around, giving Korra some privacy to strip off her clothes and slip on her new uniform. Shockingly, it fit perfectly. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Okay! You can all turn around now.” She told them. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You look great, Korra!” Bolin exclaimed. “Fits you like a glove, that should be easier to play in.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She smiled at him, and looked to Asami. “Uh, thanks for the uniform.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m glad it fits.” She giggled. “I was worried it would be too long on you. You have always been pretty short.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra felt her cheeks turn read. “Hey that’s not fair I’m not short you’re just overly tall.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami reached to touch her shoulder and Korra felt a spark run through her. “I was just kidding, Korra. Acquaintances, remember?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra kept scowling, but had to admit it was the perfect uniform. She didn’t let herself wonder how Asami guessed her measurements so precisely. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Well, I’ll see you guys before the match tonight! Asami and I better be off for lunch now.” Mako smiled at them, reaching an arm around Asami’s shoulder and walking off with her. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra went to pick up her bag, starting to leave the practice room before Bolin called her back. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“So…just us, huh? Alone. Maybe we should go get some lunch while they do. I know a great spot-” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Sorry! Gotta train with Tenzin!” She jogged out the room, mentally praying that Bolin wasn’t asking her on a date. Everything was confusing enough, she didn’t need to deal with that too. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>…</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra liked feeding the lemurs. She liked as they would swoop down, sometimes messing up her hair as they swarmed the cage. Ikki and Jinora’s excitement was contagious, and the times she spent with them just doing chores around the island soon became some of her favorite times. Her mom sometimes said she still acted like a kid, and being with Ikki and Jinora made her feel like maybe her mom was correct, but she didn’t see how that always had to be a bad thing. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“So, Korra. How is it going with that firebender boy?” Jinora asked innocently. Korra shot her a look of annoyance, planning to ignore her. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Ikki did not have the same plan. “Does Korra like a boy? What does he look like? Is he handsome? Can I meet him? Are you in love?”  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra finished emptying the last of the food into the lemurs food bin before sighing. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m not in love and no you cannot meet him. I don’t like Mako, we’re just teammates. Besides, he’s dating someone else.” She hoped that explanation would be enough for them but, of course, it wasn’t. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Did you ever talk to her like I told you to?” Jinora questioned, leading them out of the lemur pen to the main part of the island. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Sort of? We have this weird “acquaintance” thing going on. I’m seeing her and Mako again tonight.” Jinora looked at her incredulously, conveying that she wasn’t buying Korra’s words for a second. “Okay, let’s pretend I did like Mako- what should I do?” She looked at the two children, expecting them to give her perfect life advice about her romantic prospects. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They both launched into tales about romance novels they had read and how she could get a dragon (</span>
  <em>
    <span>a dragon?) </span>
  </em>
  <span>to win him over and Korra would have laughed if she wasn’t so stressed about the whole situation.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You need to be honest about your feelings, Korra.” She whipped her head around to see Pema standing by the hallway, rubbing her belly. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh, uh, hey Pema.” Korra stuttered. The two airbender children ran up to hug their mother as Pema chuckled at their enthusiasm. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Years ago, before I was with Tenzin, he was with someone else. It hurt so much to watch him be with the wrong person I eventually just had to confess my love to him. You can’t sit by while your soulmate is with someone else.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra bit the inside of her cheek, thinking about Pema’s words. If it was Mako and some random girl it would be easy. She wasn’t shy, she would just tell him how she felt and see what happened. But it wasn’t a random girl, it was Asami, and despite everything she didn’t want Asami getting hurt. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She wanted Mako, but was it worth risking losing Asami again? Did she even </span>
  <em>
    <span>have </span>
  </em>
  <span>Asami again? She thought about Naga, how excited she was to bring her to the stadium tonight so she and Asami could see each other again. Asami was like a whirlwind, and Korra could already feel herself getting caught back up in it. She wanted to impress her, to spend time with her. But she liked Mako, too, and she couldn’t see anyway she could date him without ruining her ‘acquaintanceship’ with Asami. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I think I need to talk with Asami. Thanks for your advice guys.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jinora cocked her head. “Asami? The pretty girl with the long hair from the gala? Is that who Mako is dating?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra glowered. “Yep. That’s her.” She turned around, walking off toward her room so she could start preparing for the game tonight, and more importantly, preparing for what she wanted to say to Asami. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>…</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She waited by the back of the stadium for a while. She and Asami had agreed to meet here before the game, but the clock was ticking and soon she would have to head in to start warming up. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She decided to wait five more minutes before she would give up. She didn’t want Asami screwing her around again. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Naga’s head perked up suddenly as her nose started sniffing and tail started wagging. Korra looked at her inquisitively until she saw Asami walking up with what appeared to be fish jerky in her hands. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Naga!” Asami squealed, running up and throwing her hands around Naga’s thick neck. Naga enthusiastically started licking Asami’s face while she giggled, scratching behind Naga’s ears just the way she liked. She offered the jerky to Naga who scarfed it down in a moment’s notice. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You haven’t changed at all, girl.” Asami smiled, learning her face against Naga’s. “Thanks for bringing her with you. I’ve missed her so much.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra twitched her lips to form the slightest smile at her. “She missed you too. I’m surprised you let her lick your face, what with all the makeup you wear now.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami bristled, keeping her arms around Naga but turning to look at Korra. “What’s that meant to mean?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra panicked, noticing how Asami was growing angrier. “Nothing! I just meant...I guess that you’ve changed and I wouldn’t expect you to be down to get as dirty as you once did.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami’s face faltered. “You really don’t know me, Korra.” She sighed, she knew this but didn’t like hearing it. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Sorry. I know.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>Asami went back to focusing all of her attention on Naga, who was thoroughly enjoying the ear rub. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I think we really need to talk, Asami. About what happened between us. I know you’re dating Mako now, but I really like him and I don’t want him to get hurt.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami gritted her teeth, letting them grind uncomfortably over each other. “What makes you think I would hurt Mako? I really like him too, I’m his girlfriend.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra felt her face heating up, whether from embarrassment or anger she wasn’t sure . “Are you kidding? After what you did to me?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami opened her mouth to respond, anger brewing on her face, but Bolin stepped around the corner. “Uh, Korra. Game is gonna start soon. We need to start warming up.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra leaned forward to pat Naga on the nose. “Stay out here, girl, I’ll come by to get you after the game is finished.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami still looked furious, but followed Bolin and Korra into the stadium. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Uh, is everything okay?” Bolin asked. Asami snapped her neck to look at him, a cool smile played over her face, allowing the slightest of glances toward Korra before she continued. To anyone else, she looked perfectly put together, unreadable. Korra, however, could tell she was seething, preparing to lash out. “Fine. I’m just excited to see Mako in the game. I’m taking him out to a really nice dinner after to celebrate. I have to go through the spectator entrance. Bye, guys.” She stormed off and Korra let out a breath-- how come Asami gets mad when she reminds her what </span>
  <em>
    <span>she </span>
  </em>
  <span>did. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Maybe talking to Asami won’t work. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>…</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami tried to cool down once she was in her seat. She focused on the excitement brewing in the crowd and her own excitement at seeing Mako play. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Or, she tried, at least. Growing up, being able to tell what Korra was thinking was always one of her favorite things about her. She was like a Polar-bear pup, as long as you knew what her reactions looked like you never had to guess what she was thinking. She now wished she could be a little harder to read. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami had discovered three things during her conversation with Korra. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>One—Korra likes Mako. Undeniably, as more than a friend. She didn’t know whether Mako liked Korra, but she knew how Korra could draw someone in. The excitement of being her friend-- she knew how to make you feel special and that she could attract anyone. If he didn’t like her now he probably would soon.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Two— Korra seems to think Asami did something wrong to </span>
  <em>
    <span>her, </span>
  </em>
  <span>as if Asami hadn’t dutifully run up to her dad once a week for </span>
  <em>
    <span>months </span>
  </em>
  <span>to send a letter to Korra. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Did I do something wrong? Are you busy with training? Are you hurt? Did you meet someone else, are they cooler than me? </span>
  </em>
  <span>She bared her soul for her, something that even at thirteen Asami never did, and she had gotten nothing in response. Asami also knew, perhaps more importantly, that Korra wasn’t one to rewrite the past. If she thought she did nothing wrong, and that Asami hurt her, that was genuinely how she perceived the situation.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Three— If she wasn’t careful, she was going to fall for Korra all over again like she had when she was thirteen, or more accurately, since she was four. Seeing Naga had reminded her of </span>
  <em>
    <span>just </span>
  </em>
  <span>how much time she and Korra had spent together as kids, how Korra always made her feel like she was free to be her own person, and opening herself up like no one else has been able to. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It left her in an unpleasant situation during the game. When it was finally the Fire Ferrets turn to play, she tried to act the role of the supportive girlfriend. She jumped and yelled as they easily decimated the Rabaroos, knocking them out in all three rounds. She was filled with pride as Mako took out the opposing team members, and was filled with something else when she noticed that every time Korra made an impressive move she looked back as if to find Asami. </span>
  <em>
    <span>It’s nothing, she’s not looking at me, just looking at the crowd. It’s Korra, she loves positive attention. </span>
  </em>
  <span>Korra became a distraction during the game. She kept trying to focus on Mako but something about the way Korra moved always pulled her focus. It was probably because she’s the Avatar, who wouldn’t want to see them bend? Or maybe it was because she and Korra used to talk about her playing in a Pro-bending game and now she was finally able to see that? Definitely not anything else. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Her mind was going a mile a minute as she tried to figure out what she wanted to do. She wanted to make sure Korra knew Mako was hers. She liked Mako, and she wasn’t planning on losing him any time soon. As soon as the game was over, she had to rush down to the locker rooms and make sure Mako was ready for their date. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She also, somehow, needed to figure out what Korra’s interpretation of their falling out was. Asami liked math, she liked science, she liked knowing exactly why things work and being able to predict what will happen. This puzzle piece wasn’t fitting in correctly and she needed to figure it out before somebody got hurt. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Perhaps, most importantly, she needed to get control of the part of her brain who wanted to pull Korra toward her and kiss her hard every time she saw her. The part of her brain who didn’t care to remember whatever had happened between her and Korra in the past. The part of her brain that kept telling her ‘</span>
  <em>
    <span>leave Mako, it’s Korra that you want.’</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Yeah, that was what she really needed to get under control. But maybe she could get that under control after spending some more time with Korra. Group hangouts couldn’t hurt, right?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>…</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami should have guessed that she would be too late for whatever Korra was planning on telling Mako. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>By the time Asami walked into the locker room, congratulating them on a wonderful game, Korra was already in the corner of the room, tail tucked between her legs after expressing her feelings and being rejected. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami didn’t know exactly what happened, but by the energy that was in the room she could tell she had just missed an awkward conversation. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Is that problem number one sorted?</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She bounced up to Mako, smacking a big kiss on his cheek and leaving a lipstick stain. She laughed as she rubbed it off, but frowned slightly as she noticed his attention was on Korra. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Okay, problem number one is definitely not solved. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra looked back at Mako and Asami, trying to wrap her head around the rejection she felt from Mako and the sting of seeing Mako get to kiss Asami. </span>
  <em>
    <span>No, wait, it’s the sting of seeing Asami get to kiss Mako. That’s what we’re upset over, remember. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She eventually dropped her gaze looking at them, realizing it hurt too much. Bolin wandered up to her, trying to appear casual. She sighed, she could guess what he was going to ask. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“So, Korra, I was hoping, maybe, you and I could go on a date sometime.” She smiled momentarily at how nervous he looked, but ultimately looked down at her shoes in order to hide her face as she turned him down. She already had her feelings divided between two people, she wasn’t sure she could pretend to have feelings for a third. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Uh, thanks Bolin but I don’t know if I’m in a date kind-of mood today. I think I’m just gonna go home.” This whole situation with Asami was driving her up the wall and the wound of rejection from Mako still sat with her. She wanted to grab Naga, head back to Air Temple Island, and fall asleep before the feelings in her brain could hurt her anymore. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It could be really fun! We can celebrate our win and I can show you some great places all over Republic City! Nothing fancy, just fun! ” She debated his words for a moment and risked looking back at Asami and Mako. She had her arms around his neck while his hands moved further south, obviously trying to cop a feel. She blushed and looked back at Bolin. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Bolin was sweet. He was kind, caring, and handsome. She could imagine fun dates where they arm wrestle each other to the ground. Most importantly, he was neither Mako nor Asami. Maybe she just needed to get over them. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I know a great place that serves authentic Southern Water Tribe food.” He taunted, using a sing-song voice to tempt her. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Okay, you know what, sure. Lets go. I’m starving anyway.” She grabbed her bag and followed Bolin out of the locker room, trying not to notice how Asami watched her as she left. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>…</span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>Her date with Bolin was fine. She liked the food and she </span>
  <em>
    <span>especially </span>
  </em>
  <span>liked harassing Tahno with him. It was fun, Bolin was fun. She just couldn’t see herself ever liking him as more than a friend. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Mako tries to fight her before a game a few days after her date with Bolin, approaching her like he was Bolin’s father and asking what her intentions with him are. She ignores the question, telling him that he’s jealous and that she knows he likes her. She doesn’t think before she says it, strictly running on autopilot, and she’s not surprised when he walks off. She finds it hard to care anymore-- she still has feelings for Mako, but it’s getting harder and harder to tell who she feels jealous of when she sees him and Asami together. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Turns out fighting with your teammates isn’t a great way to start a game, because for the first half of the match, they were performing terribly. If it weren’t for Bolin, they would have lost the whole game as Mako and Korra couldn’t get in sync with one another. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She tries to collect her thoughts by the water after the game. Luckily, or maybe unluckily, Asami wasn’t at this game. Something to do with work she needed to do at the factory. When she first learned she wouldn’t be there, she couldn’t control the disappointment that fell through her body, but with how poorly she performed she was glad Asami was there. She still wanted to impress her, no matter how hard she tried to squash that feeling.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She was just about to leave and head back to the island when Mako came up to her. She sighed as he approached, not wanting to hear him reject her again. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Korra, we need to talk. I find you infuriating half the time.” She scowled at him, trying to push away. She didn’t need to hear anything else about how he didn’t like her. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I get it, you don’t like me. You don’t have to say it again.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He pulled her back. “No, Korra, listen to me. I’m with Asami and I’m confused, but I really like you too, despite the fact that you drive me crazy.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She smirked, jabbing a finger into his chest. “So you do like me.” She leant up to kiss him, smiling as he kissed her back. It felt good, it was passionate and energetic, but as she reached to pull him closer she remembered her first kiss, timid and shy while her legs swung over the cliff, her fingers numb from the sheer cold. She tried not to be disappointed when she realized she didn’t feel the same butterflies she did back then. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>A cry bursts out from behind them, pulling them apart to see Bolin dropping a bouquet of flowers and running off. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Bolin! Wait!” Mako turned to look at Korra with an accusatory gaze before running off. “Look what you did.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What </span>
  <em>
    <span>I </span>
  </em>
  <span>did?” She yells after him, slumping back down on the ground and letting out an exasperated sigh. She hates that she is once again being blamed for everything-- everything is always Korra’s fault. Whether it’s in relationships or with the equalists, there’s always somebody blaming her. She </span>
  <em>
    <span>hates </span>
  </em>
  <span>this. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>…</span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>The next few weeks of her life are completely taken with Pro-bending. Korra is incredibly grateful for the distraction, to focus on nothing but knocking the other team off the platform. She didn’t have to think about Tarrlok or Amon or whatever was going on between her and Mako or how she was counting down the days until she would see Asami again. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Actually, having Asami at their games was incredibly distracting. If she wasn’t distracted from the game because of her complicated feelings for Mako, hearing Asami cheer for them, adorned in Fire Ferrets merch, completely pulled her focus off the game.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>After one game, one that Korra had saved from almost definite loss with some quick last minute moves, Asami runs up to Mako to give him a kiss on the cheek after the game. Korra tries, and fails, not to watch them, but she can either look at Mako and Asami or Bolin, who is still ignoring her. She chooses to watch Mako and Asami. Shockingly, however, Asami hugs Korra after kissing Mako, telling her what a great job she did. When Asami is no longer looking, Korra rubs her cheek, feeling the loss of not getting a kiss like Mako did. Korra’s mind races with fantasies of the past, being twelve and laying on the snow, listening to Pro-bending games on the radio and imaging Asami running into her arms after she played. Once she realizes what she is doing, she blushes in embarrassment. Something within Asami has switched lately, she’s no longer accusatory around Korra, and now just constantly has a look on her face like she is trying to figure Korra out. It’s fitting, Asami has always had an overwhelming power to forgive, but Korra hasn’t, and she’s not sure she is ready to forget the past like Asami seems to be.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Their final game brings out a side of herself that she tries to keep deep within her. The overly competitive, quick to anger, will take down anyone who crosses her way side. In her defense, the referee is being </span>
  <em>
    <span>totally </span>
  </em>
  <span>unfair. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It had taken so long to convince the council to keep the stadium open despite Amon’s threats, and now Korra felt like they were wasting it as they got their asses absolutely handed to them by the Wolfbats. They would have lost completely if it weren’t for Korra managing to swing Mako up to the platform again. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She hears the crowd boo-ing as the referee continues to make unfair calls in favor of the Wolfbats, working her body harder than she has before to try and </span>
  <em>
    <span>somehow </span>
  </em>
  <span>still get them the win. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It’s fruitless, however, and the Wolfbats win. They win, and then everything changes. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It was set up. Amon is here and they’re tied up under the platform and Korra has no idea how she’s going to get out of here. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Despite her situation, she finds herself thanking the spirits that Asami isn’t here. She was upset, at the beginning of the game, that she wouldn’t be able to look back at her and show her what she can do during the game. But, as the dome of the stadium starts to collapse, she’s grateful for whatever caused Asami to not come. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She realizes, then and there, that she is not over her friendship with Asami. She’s not over their what-if-we-were-more-than-friends, she’s not sure if she ever truly was. Most terrifyingly, she doesn’t know if she ever will be. </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Take the words for what they are</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I finally have another chapter for you! Sorry, I got hit by a ton of writer's block and work got crazy, so it took me a while to get this out. </p><p>But! I have all the chapters fully planned out so you can now see exactly how long it will be. If you want to harass me for more chapters (and please do) or to give me more prompts my twitter is @turtleduckride. </p><p>The title of this chapter comes from Illicit Affairs by Taylor Swift and prepare to see more chapter titles from her songs because folklore rotted my brain.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>No one gets seriously hurt during the fight. Korra tries to focus on that as she sees the state of the stadium, the roof caved in with litter and rubble dotting the surrounding area. She’s here to help Mako and Bolin move out of the stadium, and as she runs up the stairs to find them she’s excited to announce that she checked with Tenzin and they are all good to move to Air Temple Island. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Mako’s looking at her awkwardly when she becomes aware of a presence other than the brothers in the room. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hey, Korra!” Asami chirps, Pabu wrapped around her shoulders as she drags a box down the ladder of the loft. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“The boys are actually going to come live with me at the estate. That might make it easier on Tenzin and Pema so you don’t have to host them.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra’s face dropped. Despite all the awkwardness between her and the brothers recently, she was so excited to have them live with her-- to have </span>
  <em>
    <span>friends </span>
  </em>
  <span>live with her. She didn’t even attempt to hide her disappointment from her face, there was no point. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Isn’t that awesome, Korra!” Bolin grabbed Mako, slinging an arm around his brother’s shoulders. “From sleeping on the streets to going to live in a mansion! Who would have thought?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra smiles momentarily at their happiness, things with Bolin seemed to be returning back to normal. While she still felt some awkwardness with Mako, Bolin bounced back like it was nothing. She liked that about him, liked that she didn’t have to worry about her relationship with him. They tried it, it didn’t work, and they could move on. Bolin would always be her friend, no matter what happened, and Korra was beyond happy that she knew she could count on him. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She glanced around the room, noticing it had been almost entirely packed up, with only a few remaining boxes on the floor. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Well, I guess you guys don’t really need my help then. I’ll see you around sometime?” She awkwardly starts to back out of the room, silently cursing herself for not knowing how to act in this situation. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami sets the box she is carrying down on the floor, popping her hip out and resting her hand upon it. “Why don’t you come over to my place tomorrow? The boys are moving in tonight but I doubt we will have time for a full tour. You can come by and I can show you all around.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra glances from side to side, daring to look at Asami’s face for a second. “I don’t know. I’m sure I’ll have tons of Avatar stuff to do.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami rolls her eyes, a habit Korra feels she is directing at her </span>
  <em>
    <span>far </span>
  </em>
  <span>too often. “C’mon Korra, you deserve to have fun too. You can bring Naga along too, it’s a really big property and I know she would love to run around the grounds.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She chews her lip, glancing over at the faces of the three other people in the room, all looking at her hopefully. “Okay, fine. I’ll see you all tomorrow.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She doesn’t like how easy it’s becoming to do whatever Asami wants.</span>
</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra knew the Sato estate would be huge. Asami had told her stories when they were younger about all the amenities they had and how it was the best place in the world to play hide and seek. They might (</span>
  <em>
    <span>might) </span>
  </em>
  <span>be too old for hide and seek now, but riding Naga up to the intimidating front gates gave her the urge to ask Asami if they had time for one little game, for old times sake. The property really was massive. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Naga sprinted up the driveway, happy to finally be able to run as fast as she pleased, something she hadn’t fully been able to do since they arrived in Republic City. They swing around to the front door of the mansion and she hops off Naga, taking off her harness and leaving it sloppily in the driveway. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She pats Naga’s neck and gives her a scratch behind the ears. “Go run, girl!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Watching as Naga races back around the property, Korra takes a deep breath, turning to face the front door and preparing to knock. Before she can, the door opens and a man that Korra guesses is the butler greets her. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Uh...hi! I’m here to see Asami.” She waves awkwardly, but he doesn’t return the gesture. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Of course, Avatar. Follow me. They’re currently swimming in the pool.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The walk to the pool is </span>
  <em>
    <span>long </span>
  </em>
  <span>and Korra tries to take in as much as she can. It’s cold-- there’s only one picture of the family that she spots, an old one that must have been done only a year or so after she met Asami for the first time. She smiles seeing Yasuko’s face, she didn’t remember much about her, but what she did remember was characterized only by love and warmth. In a way, the mansion reminded her of the compound. It wasn’t a home, just a place someone lived. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She could tell they were getting closer to the pool when she heard a big splash followed by Mako yelling. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“The changing room is to your left, Avatar. One of the other members of the staff is in the pool room currently, if you require any assistance he will be more than happy to provide it.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Without another word, the butler turned back to walk down the hallway. Korra debated going into the changing room to take off her clothes, leaving her in just her bindings, but she figured if she got wet she could always just bend it out. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Right as she walks in, Bolin jumps off the top of a waterfall, spraying water around the room. Korra smiles at his contagious happiness before noticing Mako and Asami sitting on the side of the pool, looking like something out of a magazine. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The butler in this room clears his throat, announcing that Korra has arrived. She feels it’s a bit of an overkill, she can introduce herself, but she’s grateful she doesn’t have to figure out how. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Korra!” Asami calls. “I’m glad you could make it!” She lowers herself into the pool and begins to swim over to her. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You guys seem to have settled in well.” Korra laughs, seeing how the boys look completely at home. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Mako smiles at her, the discomfort between them was still there, but like the situation with Asami, they both seemed to have a silent agreement to ignore it until everything surrounding them </span>
  <em>
    <span>outside </span>
  </em>
  <span>the relationship calmed down. “Pretty much! It was easy to move in. Except </span>
  <em>
    <span>someone </span>
  </em>
  <span>forgot to ask her father if we could stay here.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra glanced over at Asami, noticing the devious smirk on her face, the smirk that used to be reserved for when they planned to sneak out of the compound together. Or when they convinced the guards to allow them extra sweets after dinner. Or when they would figure out a way to get Korra out of training for the day. Or when--she stopped herself, refusing herself to go down that path. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It’ll be fine. It’s easier to ask for forgiveness than permission.” Korra smiles at her, her stomach fluttering at the sound of Asami’s voice and the way she was swimming so smoothly up to her. </span>
  <em>
    <span>How does her hair still look like that?</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Bolin begins to dunk Mako under the water, Pabu playfully circling around them as Asami swims up to the side of the pool. There’s still something off about Asami, Korra can see her calculating, trying to figure her out. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“So, after so many years of hearing me talk about it, what’s it like to finally visit the Sato estate?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Well, it’s even bigger than you described it. Naga is loving the front lawns and running around it, but I’m not sure how put together the gardens are going to be after we leave.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami laughs at her, resting her cheek on her arm that was draped over the side of the pool. “That’s fine. What are gardens meant for if not to be enjoyed?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“So, what do you have planned for us today? Do you have a salon on property?” Korra smirked, dropping a foot into the water and kicking some toward Asami. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Disgruntled, Asami splashes a big wave of water to try and soak Korra, who just grins and pushes it away with her bending. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Good try, ‘Sami.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami blushes at the familiar nickname, but proceeds to climb out the pool, showing off how the swimsuit contours to her body, making Korra’s mouth go dry. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’ll get you back soon, Avatar. And, no, there’s no salon on property. I have something a little more fun in mind.” There’s a glint in her eye, a glint Korra hasn’t seen in years, that makes her body rumble with excitement. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Dry me off, then we’ll head out.” Asami turns, stretching her arms out, and when Korra doesn’t move immediately she turns her head to look at her. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Can’t you just use a towel?” Korra doesn’t like how quickly they are falling back into their old selves, she doesn’t like how quickly Asami seems to forget what happened in the past, and she doesn’t like how she wants desperately to follow in her footsteps. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Why would I dirty a towel when I have one of the world’s best water benders right here?” She turns back around, waiting for her. She does it, and follows Asami out of the room, calling for the boys who are still trying to drown each other. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>…</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her heart starts pounding when Asami leads them to a racetrack way at the back of the property, letting them sit in the viewing stands to take it all in. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra laughed incredulously. “I always kinda figured you were joking when you said you had a racetrack!” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami smiled at her. “I wouldn’t joke about something that important.” Korra’s eyes are wide with wonder as she looks at the cars spinning around the track, following as they somehow managed to stay on the track despite the tight turns. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“This is where Future Industries test drives their Satomobiles. I’m guessing you’ve still never been behind the wheel?” There was a fire in Asami’s eyes, it was that look that Korra used to find so reassuring, that there was someone who was as intense as her in this world, no matter how much the White Lotus tried to change her. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Nope. Still only know how to drive Naga, and half the time she’s the one leading me.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Want me to take you out for a spin?” Korra’s eyes lit up. She forgot about how Asami abandoned her, she forgot about the years of loneliness after she left, she forgot about her feelings for Mako and how awkward this situation was-- the only thing she could think about was how happy she was to have her best friend back, even if she wasn’t her best friend anymore. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Let’s do it!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami hops out of the stands to head to a wall where helmets and goggles were hanging. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You’re going to need one of these first.” She grabbed a helmet off the wall, biting her lip with embarrassment when the helmet couldn’t fit over her top ponytail. “Might have to smush your hair a little.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra giggled as Asami pushed her ponytail down, fitting the helmet on top of her head. “Guess you’re just gonna have to design a new helmet for the stylish Water Tribe girl on the go.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I guess so. Maybe we could have a little hole at the top where you can stick the ponytail through. It will look ridiculous, of course. Now come on, Ponytail, lets get on the course.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra followed after her, hopping in the back seat of the car. She fastened the goggles over her face as Asami jumped into the front seat. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hold on tight, okay, it’s a bit faster than Naga.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>A flag was waved and Asami sped off, the hair that wasn’t trapped under her helmet billowed as they drove. Korra’s attention felt divided, she couldn’t tell whether she wanted to look at the determined expression on Asami’s face, to watch how quickly the surroundings passed, or the multiple times they almost crashed into the other car but last minute, thanks to Asami’s skillful control, managed to miss. She decided, overall, to focus on the bubbling excitement in her stomach and the familiarity that overtook her whole body. The pressure she always felt to calm down, contain herself-- she never felt that with Asami. Korra knew, instinctively, that this feeling was dangerous, but for right now, she decided to ignore that danger. This feeling of warmth, of love, of knowledge she wasn’t alone in this life; she could relish in it for the length of the race car track, and after that she would just have to figure something else out. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>For the few minutes she was in the back of the car, feeling the wind whip her ears and letting out the occasional yelp, it was like nothing had changed. But, eventually, Asami crossed the finish line, beating the other driver, and it was over. Asami hopped over the side of the car, Korra following behind and almost tripping on her way out, removing her helmet to reveal hair that had not been messed up in the slightest, shaking it loose with a hair toss. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Asami! That was amazing! I really didn’t think we would make it at the end!” Korra took off her helmet as well, grateful to no longer have her ponytail pressed into her head. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami continued running her hands through her hair, fluffing it as she did. “Of course I made it. I always win, especially when it comes to cars.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra rolled her eyes. “Cocky, much?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You’re one to talk.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They both laughed, a genuine sound that almost made Korra blush. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“That was really fun. I wasn’t fair to you at first. I thought you had changed a lot and you wouldn’t be down to get as, I don’t know, dirty anymore. No offense.” She looked down at her shoes in embarrassment, not wanting to know how Asami would react.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami just cocked an eyebrow, a slight smile playing onto her face. “I have changed, so have you. But I could still kick your ass, any time, any place.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra’s head popped up, her mouth falling open in shock. “You absolutely could not. I am not eight anymore. Have you seen the muscles I have now? I’ll fight you right now.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami just laughed, reaching out a hand to softly rub Korra’s arm. “Maybe later. I want to show you around the rest of the estate first.” She grabbed Korra’s hand, pulling her back over to where the boys were waiting for them. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>…</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Asami was, if nothing else, careful. She had a plan when she invited Korra over-- she would see if, first of all, she could make Korra let her guard down. It was going well so far, the race track had worked perfectly and the awkwardness that tended to surround them was wearing away.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The next part of her plan was more difficult. She wanted to find out </span>
  <em>
    <span>why </span>
  </em>
  <span>Korra stopped writing to her, to know what happened all those years ago, if Korra ever felt the same way she did. But she couldn’t do that while Mako and Bolin were around, and if she asked Korra flat out she would just get angry. She had to be careful, and luckily, she was good at that. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>However, as they walked back through the front doors of the mansion, Asami preparing to give them a tour, she felt her restraint slipping. She wanted Mako and Bolin to leave and drag Korra to her room to just </span>
  <em>
    <span>talk. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She couldn’t do that, and she fought off the urge, but it was a nasty reminder to herself that she didn’t really care for Mako. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami liked Mako, she really did, he was sweet and handsome and relatively okay in bed, but the second she saw Korra again it was like he was just a background figure to her. She was happy to invite him and Bolin to live with her, but she would be lying to herself if she didn’t admit that she hasn’t broken up with him in part because she was worried that if he left, so would Korra. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It made her feel disgusting, like she was cheating on him, using him. Maybe, on some level, she was. Asami knew her relationship with Mako wasn’t going to last, and she was sure within the next few months they would separate. She was under no delusion that they were in it for the long run, but she had to hold on to him as long as she could. If Mako was her connection to Korra, then she could be selfish for a while and continue dating him. When he inevitably cheated on her with Korra, a fact she had accepted long ago, she wouldn’t be hurt, she just wanted to make sure she understood her relationship with Korra before it happened. Their relationship had started out normally, she genuinely did like him! But she was an adult now, and she recognized that she was using him to get closer to Korra while he was using her for her money. She felt that was fair, and if they could enjoy some time together in the meantime, it wouldn’t hurt anyone. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>She hoped. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Her relationship with Mako wasn’t what was keeping her up at night, anyway. It was the missing puzzle piece. Asami loved puzzles, she loved machines and making sure each piece fit perfectly so it could run. Her relationship with Korra had a missing piece, and it was driving her crazy that she didn’t know what it was. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>So, with a deep breath, she pretended her mind wasn’t moving a mile a minute, and turned toward the other three people with her. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“So, who is ready for the tour? We can start with my bedroom, I’m biased but I think it’s decorated </span>
  <em>
    <span>very </span>
  </em>
  <span>well.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Her eyes flickered to Korra’s face, who had a small smile on her face. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I mean Mako and I kinda got a tour yesterday.” Bolin shrugged. Asami cursed, praying they would go along with it. She needed Korra in her room and she was sure she wouldn’t agree if the boys didn’t </span>
  <em>
    <span>also </span>
  </em>
  <span>come along. “We were kind of hoping we could go hop in the pool.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami’s eyebrow furrowed, trying to figure out how she could fix this. “Are you sure? You haven’t seen the west side yet--”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yeah I’m good! The racetrack made me hot and I need to use the bathroom, anyway. Mako, you coming to the pool with me?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Bolin started walking toward the pool, Mako following right after him. There was a pause of ten seconds where she and Korra both looked at their shoes, unsure how to proceed, before Korra started following after them. She stuttered, unsure what she could say to make Korra stay with her. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Shockingly, it was Mako who was her savior, turning around and putting a hand on Korra’s shoulder. “Why don’t you go with Asami. Maybe you guys can, I don’t know, talk a bit during the tour.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“But-” Korra protested, her face heating with blush. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It’ll be fun! Please, Korra.” She reached out to grab onto Korra’s arm, trying to plead with her without looking desperate, something she was sure she was failing at. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra’s mouth twitched, a hand reaching up to tug on one of her ponytails nervously. “Okay. Fine. But it’s gotta be quick I need to do something for Tenzin after.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami smiled, hands clasping together in happiness. “Great! Then let’s go, it’s upstairs to the right. Follow me.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Mako leaned back, giving Asami a quick kiss on the cheek, and she tried not to show her discomfort. He </span>
  <em>
    <span>was </span>
  </em>
  <span>still her boyfriend, she just happened to still have feelings for a girl she liked when she was a kid. A girl he also liked, who also liked him. A girl who was watching him kiss her on the cheek and looked upset. Classic situation. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>On the way to her room, she pointed out where the various doors lead-- her dad’s office, the bathroom, the library. It reminded her of when she first visited Korra at the compound when they were kids. It was exciting, back then, that Korra got to live in a giant house with training courses that, at that age, just seemed like fun playgrounds. It was only a year later, when Asami visited again, that Korra no longer enjoyed the compound, calling it a prison instead. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It was kind of funny, looking back, that Korra moved into the compound around the same time that Asami’s mom died, transforming her once loving home into a cold, guarded house. In retrospect, that loneliness allowed them to find a home within each other, making the separation that much more painful. It was remembering that pain, however,  that reminded her of the task at hand, and she turned her head to look at Korra before they arrived at her room. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra had a weird look on her face, and before she could get anymore nervous, Asami just decided to press on and open the door. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“So this is where I, uh, sleep.” Asami blushed, she was always so smooth, so controlled-- she hated that Korra could turn her into a bumbling mess. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra, bless her, just smiled at her, letting her eyes glance around the room. “It’s big. Red.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami’s lips twitched before bursting out into laughter. “Big, red. That describes it I suppose.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra smiled back at her, before her face became more serious again. “So does Mako sleep in here with you?” There was a bitterness to her voice, a jealousy that, if Asami was being generous, she could pretend was because she wanted to be with </span>
  <em>
    <span>her</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Do we have to talk about that? Why don’t we just head to the next room.” She gripped her elbow, glancing back at the door. She cursed herself for practically </span>
  <em>
    <span>begging</span>
  </em>
  <span> to be put in the situation. She should have known how awkward it would be. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No, no. I’m sorry. Ignore me.” Korra started walking over to the dresser in one corner of the room, dark wood with gold accents, covered with pictures. “Hey, is that what I think it is?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>A smile broke out on Korra’s face as she picked up the framed sepia photo. Asami came to stand next to her, matching her smile as they looked down at the photo. Chubby cheeks and limbs, splayed over a baby-Naga stared back at them. “Remember when I made that ugly frame and gave you a copy for your birthday? I worked so hard on it and it turned out terrible.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra let out a noise of complaint. “Hey, I like that frame! I still have mine in my room back in the compound. I debated bringing it with me but, I don’t know, I guess I didn’t want to think about it.”</span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>Before the situation could get awkward, Asami tried to move the conversation along. “We were so ridiculous back then. We could have died in that blizzard.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra chuckled. “Worth it. And we wouldn’t have died. You’re too smart, we would have figured a way back.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, right. If anything you bending that igloo kept us alive. That was right after you told me about being the Avatar, right?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Neither of them took their eyes off the photo, knowing that daring to look at each other could end this conversation before it really started. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yep. Everything changed after that.” Korra sighed, tracing the reflection of her face when she was little. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“We didn’t change though. We stayed the same.” Asami knew it was risky, bringing it up. She was throwing aware her carefully constructed plan, but she couldn’t help it. She needed to know. She needed to know </span>
  <em>
    <span>now. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Nope. We didn’t change until years later.” Korra’s tone was sharp, pointed. Asami swallowed the urge to snap back. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, things got messy, then. Korra, I-” Their eyes met each other, the picture still clasped in Korra’s hands. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You don’t need to explain anything, Asami. I get it. People change, grow apart. You had friends here, I’m sure that became more important.” Her tone had edge, but it was coated under layers of sadness. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Korra what are you talking about?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>There were tears streaming down Korra’s face now, a mixture of melancholy and frustration. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You abandoned me. We spent weeks kissing and I thought we were going to be something more! You promised me you wouldn’t abandon me and you did! We didn’t even need to be something more, we could have stopped being friends, even. But you didn’t tell me anything. You left me alone.” She was crying in earnest now, laying the photo back on the dresser and turning to walk out of the room. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami reached to grab her, trying to keep her own emotions in check and prevent herself from crying at the memory. “Korra, please don’t leave. Please. I think there’s been a misunderstanding. Just don’t leave, we can talk about this.” She knew it wasn’t worth anything-- Korra’s instinct was to leave when she was angry. She lashed out, got upset, and then didn’t want to deal with the conversation that should occur after. It didn’t matter if they were nine and she was angry at her parents, pulling Asami onto Naga and running off into the tundra or if they were, well, arguing in Asami’s bedroom. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra was almost out of the door. “I can’t, Asami. This still hurts so much. I wanted to be friends again, but I don’t know if I can do this.” With a sigh, she opened the door. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I think I need to head home. Can I use the bathroom before I leave?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami groaned, her mind whirring with information. Korra could be so </span>
  <em>
    <span>completely </span>
  </em>
  <span>impossible sometimes, and trying to run away from this was going to make Asami scream. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Fine!” She snapped. “Go home and let’s not talk about this. Don’t even try and listen to my perspective.You know where the bathroom is.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She whipped past Korra, not waiting for her answer before stomping down the hallway. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Ten minutes later, when Korra ran out of the house with something other than anger on her face (Nervousness?, Fear?,  Excitement?), she didn’t say goodbye. </span>
</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>
  <span>She tried not to think about Korra after that. She returned to the pool, telling the boys that Korra had to go home, neglecting to tell them about the fight. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>On some level, she had gotten what she wanted. She understood Korra’s perspective a bit more, they had </span>
  <em>
    <span>some </span>
  </em>
  <span>level of communication, but Korra had ran away and it annoyed her to no end. She had expected it, but it still hurt. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It hurt even more when the next day, Korra showed up with a whole fleet of the police force, claiming her dad was part of the equalists. She was furious, and it was sweet watching Mako defend her, but she couldn’t get over the betrayal from Korra. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Before she left, with </span>
  <em>
    <span>no </span>
  </em>
  <span>evidence, she finally let herself rise to anger. “Korra this isn’t fair. I’ve been trying to talk to you forever, begging you to talk to me and yesterday you run out of the house after accusing me of </span>
  <em>
    <span>abandoning </span>
  </em>
  <span>you. Now you have the audacity to come in and accuse my father? What next, you’re going to claim I’m Amon? You can’t do this!” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra just looked at her, something like pity clouding her face. It just angered Asami more. “Get out of my house.” She snapped, turning to walk back up the stairs, grasping Mako’s hand to drag him with her. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She didn’t turn to see Korra, looking heart broken, at the bottom of the stairs. </span>
</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>
  <span>The next day she’s relaxing with Mako in the longue, twirling a cocktail lightly with a straw and showing him some of her favorite records, and she realizes she hasn’t been fair to Mako. Korra completely overwhelmed her, and for a week or so, her whole life had become Korra. She was ready to abandon Mako, to jump into Korra’s arms again and pick up from when they were thirteen, but Korra was different now. She was different now. It wasn’t easy, like it used to be. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She pondered, for a moment, if she even </span>
  <em>
    <span>wanted </span>
  </em>
  <span>Korra anymore, but that thought was fleeting. She had wanted Korra since she first saw her, no matter what capacity that was in. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It was a difficult position to be in, feeling constant anger toward Korra when all she wanted to do was just </span>
  <em>
    <span>be </span>
  </em>
  <span>with her. It was even worse knowing that when she tried to talk to her about it, she ran away. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>When Korra and the police force storm into her house for the second night in a row, interrupting her very peaceful night it just angers her further. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She was screaming in Lin’s face, demanding to know why they were here, for Lin to metaphorically slap her in the face claiming that there was a factory </span>
  <em>
    <span>under her house</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>When they ask her where her dad currently is, she glares at Korra, who is refusing to make eye contact with her. She tells them he’s in the workshop, just wanting to get this over with, and continues to glare at Korra as they walk over. Korra is silent, staring at her feet as she walks, and Asami realizes she has never been more betrayed than she is right now. It’s almost enough to break her. If she thought no longer receiving letters from Korra was bad, this was excruciating, but she can read Korra, and she can tell how she’s beating herself up for this. Asami wishes that was enough. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>And then they find the tunnel. They find the tunnel and Korra is trying to apologize to her and Asami can’t hear anything but the ringing in her ears. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“There’s an explanation for this.” Asami stutters. She knows there is not. Of course there is not. But she can’t lose hope. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m sorry. Maybe you don’t know everything about your father.” Korra reaches out, trying to touch Asami’s arm, but Asami jerks away. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Don’t touch me.” She snapped, almost regretting it when she noticed how Korra bristled. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>For a second, it was like they were the only ones in the room, everyone else falling away as they looked at each other, both trying to convey an emotion they couldn’t describe. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It wasn’t until Lin Beifong coughed that they remembered there were other people in the room. With a sigh and one final look of regret, Korra turned her attention back to everyone else in the room, while Asami dropped her gaze to the floor. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Officers. Korra. In the tunnel. Lets go, and be cautious.” Lin barked, gesturing for everyone to follow her as she descended into the tunnel. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami tries to follow them, along with the boys, but Lin snaps, telling them to stay where they are. She rolls her eyes in protest, but she knows fighting with them won’t help her case. But she has to see if for herself, to know what her dad was up to. Was he part of the equalists? If he was, how long had this been going on? How had she never noticed? Possibly, the scariest thought of all, was realizing that if he were part of the equalists, he was a danger to Korra. A danger to the girl he met when she was just a baby, innocent and pure and Asami’s first friend. If he had these beliefs for a while, at any point he could have hurt her, and the last coil of hope within Asami silently begged this was some whole misunderstanding, even though she knew it wasn’t, because she would never be able to trust her father again. And, in the darkest part of her mind, she worried that Korra would never be able to trust her again, either. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The brothers tricked the guard, tying him to a barrel, and she tried not to roll her eyes when Mako told her to stay above ground. She said yes, trying to appease him, and started counting to 120 in her mind. She would follow, she’s not getting left behind this time. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>…</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra’s barely conscious, hanging off of Mako’s back, her arms slung around his shoulders as he tries to drag her out of the tunnel. Korra is vaguely aware of screaming, of arguing, but the ringing in her ears from the fight won’t dissipate enough for her to focus on anything. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She realizes Hiroshi is talking directly to Mako now, and she can pick out the words “firebending” and “street rat.” Her mind is coming back, slowly, enough to see Asami was now there--</span>
  <em>
    <span>when did Asami get there? </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami is yelling, telling her dad to stop, and Korra is desperately trying to blink her eyes open faster so she can see what is going on-- to help, if necessary. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“--Keep you out of this as long as I could, but now you know the truth, please, forgive me.” Hiroshi’s voice is calm, pleading. Korra feels disgusted. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra can’t read Asami’s face. She’s not conflicted, but she’s calculating, and Korra can’t figure out what she’s deciding on. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami doesn’t say anything as her dad speaks to her, just stares at him, the slightest tears starting to well in her eyes. “Asami, please, they took your mother away from me, the love of my life. Everything I’ve done, I’ve done to protect you. Joining the equalists, funding Amon, getting you in self defense classes, keeping you away from the Avatar... It’s all been for you.” He takes off one of his gloves, handing it to her, and Korra is vaguely aware that something Hiroshi just said didn’t quite add up, but now Asami is slipping on the glove and she can’t focus on anything except the heartbreak she feels. “Join me, Asami.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She has the glove fully on her hand now and Korra feels her whole world shattering. </span>
  <em>
    <span>No, Asami. Please. Think about us. I know this isn’t you. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She can’t get her mouth to form words, but now Asami is moving closer to her dad and her arm is raised. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I love you, Dad.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>And she shocked him. </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. I had the shiniest wheels, now they're rusting</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Look who is finally back. Sorry for such a delay. Major writers block coupled with work getting absolutely bonkers bananas. But here is a chapter!</p><p>You may have noticed it's now out of 10 chapters as opposed to 9-- it's because my plan for this one was so packed and by the time I got to the (now) ending, I realized it would be wayyyyyyy too much content for one chapter. </p><p>I'm not really happy with this chapter in general...feel way too plot heavy but lmk what you think!</p><p>Chapter title is from This is Me Trying by Taylor Swift.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Asami doesn’t clearly remember what happened immediately after. She remembers the </span>
  <em>
    <span>thump </span>
  </em>
  <span>of her father’s body as it hit the ground, she remembers the gasps of the others in the room, and she remembers how overwhelmingly cold she felt as soon as it was done. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It’s an hour later and she’s sitting in the lounge, just as she was a few hours ago with Mako and Bolin, except now she was wrapped in a blanket someone </span>
  <em>
    <span>(maybe Mako?) </span>
  </em>
  <span>had grabbed her while her mind reeled with the knowledge that her life as she knew it was a lie. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She loved her dad. She truly considered him one of her best friends, she could always trust him, always have him in her corner. What else was he lying about, what else had he kept from her?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Police swarmed the estate, the normally peaceful grounds now a flurry of commotion. She couldn’t stay here. Even if it wasn’t now a </span>
  <em>
    <span>crime scene </span>
  </em>
  <span>she didn’t want to be here. She didn’t want to be reminded that everything she thought about her father, </span>
  <em>
    <span>her life, </span>
  </em>
  <span>was a life. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>But where would she go? She didn’t have any other family, at least not in the city. Her boyfriend lived </span>
  <em>
    <span>with her, </span>
  </em>
  <span>so it’s not like she could go stay with him. She was alone. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She felt a hand lightly grip her shoulder, tugging her attention away from the wall she had been staring at since she sat down. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Asami. Earth to Asami.” She looked up, seeing Mako, Korra, and Bolin standing right by her, Mako’s hand still on her shoulder. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“So, Korra says we still have an invitation to live at Air Temple Island, and she said you can come too. I know your whole world just changed, but we can help you pack if you want.” Mako is forcing a smile as he looks at her, Korra and Bolin now standing behind him, their faces a mixture of emotions. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She blinked, slowly, her mind still a vortex trying to process everything that happened in the last few hours. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Dad. Equalist. Korra hurt. Mako hurt. Workshop under house? Dad. An equalist? For how long?</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Asami? Are you listening to us?” Was that Mako? Korra? Her mind couldn't place the voice. She realized Mako’s hand was still on her shoulder. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She shook her head. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Pull it together, Asami. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Sorry. What did you say?” She blushed slightly, forcing her mind to focus on the three people in the room rather than on everything that had happened. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“We can go to Air Temple Island, we’re going to move in tomorrow. Beifong says we can sleep here tonight but by tomorrow we are going to have to clear out so they can fully investigate the mansion. You’re free to come to Air Temple Island with us, we can even help you pack.” As if a reminder, a group of police walked into the room, swiftly passing through to the back door but distracting Mako from his speech. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami smiled despite herself, “That’ll be great. Thanks, guys. I shouldn’t need any help packing, though.” She pulled herself off the sofa, shrugging Mako’s hand off her shoulder. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Are you sure? We’re more than happy to help!” Bolin cheered, flashing one of his toothy smiles as her. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m sure. I’m gonna head upstairs and start packing. Thanks, guys.” She gave them all a small smile, her gaze lingering on Korra’s worried face before she turned to walk toward the staircase. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Being in her room was strange, as it didn’t feel like </span>
  <em>
    <span>her </span>
  </em>
  <span>room anymore. The whole house usually felt cold,  but now it felt unwelcoming and unfamiliar. She couldn’t wait to get out of there, but Asami packed slowly anyway, taking her time to fold her clothes carefully before placing them in her suitcase, her body sluggish as she focused on her internal debates. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Her mind kept repeating the last things he said to her. Calling Mako a street rat, twisting her mother’s memory for his own beliefs, keeping her away from Korra. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“...keeping you away from the Avatar... It’s all been for you.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>In the last few years before their separation, he had been odd about letting her travel down south for Korra, bristling when Asami mentioned that Korra was starting to learn firebending, and when Asami had begged to go south when the letters stopped he had been firm in saying no, suggesting she move on instead. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>The letters. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It clicked into place suddenly. Neither of them had abandoned each other, he was intervening. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The blouse she was folding dropped from her hands. Everything made sense. No wonder Korra was angry, no wonder she thought she had to protect Mako from her, no wonder that Korra thought she had abandoned her. Asami felt her heart shatter. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Proof. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She needed proof. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami dashed from her room, dodging the police officers milling around in the hallway. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Would he have kept the letters? Did he just throw them out? If he had them where would they be?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She stopped, clutching her forehead like she was suffering from a migraine. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>His office. She wasn’t allowed in his office. That was the only place that was for Hiroshi only, the only place in the massive estate she wasn’t meant to go. And Asami had always listened. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>There was no way they were </span>
  <em>
    <span>not </span>
  </em>
  <span>going to investigate the office, and she had to get there quickly before it was swarming with officers. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She tried shoving the doors of the office opening, groaning when she realized it was locked. Blowing a puff of air to get the hair off her face, she reached to pull a bobby pin out. Asami stuck the clip between her teeth, bending it so she could stick it in the lock. She fumbled the bobby pin around in the lock for a few moments before she </span>
  <em>
    <span>finally </span>
  </em>
  <span>heard the lock click. She pushed the door open, having the foresight to close it after herself quickly, locking it for an added measure. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami took a glance around the office. It was clean, everything in its place. She had only been in here a few times, and always under the watchful gaze of her father. Her mind started swirling with the realization that her childhood was now permanently associated with the equalists, leading her down the same dark path she did earlier. She shook her head, calling herself back to the task at hand. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She looked through the desk first, almost breaking the drawers as she pulled them out, but eventually finding nothing. The cabinets came up empty too, and Asami wondered for a second if she was incriminating herself by putting her fingerprints all over his files. She decided not to care. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami could feel her time in the office quickly running out, her eyes darting wildly around the room in a last ditch effort to find </span>
  <em>
    <span>something, </span>
  </em>
  <span>eventually landing on the door to the closet on the left side of the room. The door of the closet swung open with a creak, revealing a small, messy room. The shelves were overflowing with random items, a contrast to the perfectly neat room it was attached to. Under different circumstances, she might have laughed at how this was a metaphor for </span>
  <em>
    <span>just </span>
  </em>
  <span>how much he kept hidden from her, but right now all she could focus on was starting to dig through the trash. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Her breath hitched when she found a large, cardboard box on the bottom shelf. She opened the top slowly, revealing a mess of photographs piled on top of a drawstring, cotton bag. With shaking hands, she picked up the top photograph, looking at the happy smile of her mother, relaxing on the beach while a four year old Asami built sandcastles in the background. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Tears began to well in her eyes as she looked at it, starting to drip down her face as Asami’s search through the box revealed multiple photos of her mother. With a mental note to bring all the photographs with her, she moved on to the bag at the bottom of the box. She could feel that it was filled with paper, taking a deep breath before she opened the bag to look inside. Staring back at her was hundreds of letters, yellowed slightly from age. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami grabbed an envelope, ripping it open roughly and pulling out the letter inside, her tears leaving small stains on the page. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Dear Asami, </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I’ve realized I really like cooking. Katara has been teaching me to cook some traditional Southern Water Tribe food and I’m really enjoying it! Today after fire-bending practice we’re going to try making some noodles from scratch. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Speaking of fire-bending practice, it’s actually going really well. The White Lotus say I’m being too aggressive with it, but I’m finding it easier than I find water-bending. It comes so naturally to me! I don’t even need a lantern to walk to the bathroom at night anymore, I can just hold a flame in my hand. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I can’t wait to show you next time you visit. I hope it will be soon. Please write back to me! I haven’t heard anything from you since you went back to Republic City. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I hope you’re okay, </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Korra. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami clutched the letter to her chest, which was heaving as she cried. Korra had written to her, and from the looks of the bag it was at least a couple times a week. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>How much was robbed from them? Where would they be now if either of them had received the letters? How could her dad keep the most important person in her life from her? </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She heard footsteps approaching the office, and she rapidly packed up the box and picked it up, carrying it out of the room as she ran to her own. On top of everything else she learned tonight, she now had to figure out what this meant for her. What it meant for </span>
  <em>
    <span>them. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Most importantly, she had to figure out how to tell Korra. </span>
</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>She spots Korra before anything else as the boat pulls closer to Air Temple Island, a spot of blue out from everything else on the dock. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It’s a cruel reminder of what she knows she has to do. Years ago, what seemed like </span>
  <em>
    <span>lifetimes </span>
  </em>
  <span>ago, she would press her nose to the window of the boat as it pulled into the Southern Water Tribe, eyes darting wildly until they landed on her target. More than once her dad had to forbid the normally careful Asami from going out on the deck of the boat, as she too often leant over the side far too much in her quest to locate Korra. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Now, surrounded by her belongings packed up in cases, it forced her to think about all the years her father had stolen from them, and how on earth she was going to tell Korra. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Mako slung an arm around her as the boat pulled closer to the island. It was meant to be a comforting gesture, and weeks ago she would have leaned closer, happy for the intimacy. Now it took everything in her to not shove him off. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It wasn’t Mako’s fault. Since the incident he had been nothing but caring, practically doting on her, waking her up with tea in the morning and making sure all her bags were taken care of. But finding the letters made Asami confront the fact that her feelings for Korra had never faded, just shifted, and the guilt that she was leading Mako on ate her up inside. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She didn’t even know if Korra still had any feelings for her, and despite her inner hopes she sincerely doubted she did, but she knew she couldn’t keep pretending to be as invested in her relationship with Mako as she once was. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It wasn’t fair to him and it wasn’t fair to her. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She let him keep an arm wrapped around her anyway as the boat finally pulled into the dock, letting herself take the smallest amount of comfort before she would have to confront Korra. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Speak of the devil, Korra jogged up to where the ramp from the boat lowered to the dock alongside the Airbender kids the second they pulled in. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hey! You’re here!” Korra greeted, a smile spreading across her face. She glanced at where the Air Acolytes were carrying Asami’s many bags off the boat. “I thought you were only bringing a few things.” She laughed, and despite herself, Asami smiled back. “Guess that hasn’t changed about you, Sato.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami bristled at the use of the name, her </span>
  <em>
    <span>father’s </span>
  </em>
  <span>name, but maintained her composure. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>You’re going to have to get over this eventually, anyway. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You’re pretty, can I have some of your hair.” Feeling a tug on her coat, Asami looked down to where the youngest Airbender child was standing, looking up at her with his other hand stuffed in his nose. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami laughed nervously, she was never quite sure how to interact with children, until Mako answered for her. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Looks like I have some competition.” He laughed. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>You have no idea. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>One of the other Airbender kids (</span>
  <em>
    <span>Ikki?) </span>
  </em>
  <span>started giving them a “tour” of the island, which was really more of her spouting off random facts about the island that Asami was sure only Bolin was listening to. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Eventually, however, the group split up, with Jinora and Meelo (as Asami learned were their names) leading Mako and Bolin to the boys dormitories while Ikki joined Korra as she showed Asami to the girls dormitories. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It was strange, the island, peaceful but yet there was constant movement. Asami tried desperately to concentrate on the many bells ringing in the wind around the island rather than the ringing in her ears due to her nervousness, but her stomach kept churning with the reminder of what she had to tell Korra. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She knew it wasn’t going to go well. No matter how many years they spent apart, Asami knew Korra like the back of her hand, and she was sure Korra would fall into her familiar pattern of getting overwhelmed, leaving, and coming back hours later when she calmed down. Korra was predictable in her unpredictability, it was one of the things Asami liked about her. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Asami?” Ikki questioned, staring up at her as they walked along the halls of the Air Temple Dormitory. “Did you know Korra likes Mako?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Everything paused. They stopped walking, and Asami felt Korra’s entire body stiffen beside her. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>There it is. The confirmation I’ve been waiting for. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>What upset her most is that she couldn’t tell if she was upset that Korra was interested in her boyfriend or that Korra was interested in someone other than her. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami wasn’t quite sure she wanted to figure out which one it was quite yet. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Suddenly, Korra grabbed her hand and started dragging her down the hallway away from Ikki, eventually pulling her into a room at the end and slamming the sliding doors closed before Ikki could follow them in. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The room was bare. Clean. The window offered a room of the Republic City skyline and she could feel a weight lifted off her when she realized nothing here reminded her of home. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra let out a breath behind her. “Sorry about Ikki. She’s a lot to handle. Talks a lot about things she doesn’t know anything about.” She laughed nervously.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>You’re lying, Korra. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami just smiled instead. “It’s fine. It’s like you’re her big sister. I know you always wanted siblings, I guess you have that now.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra smiled back at her, the tension in the room easing as Korra came closer to her. “Right, well, I didn’t know how annoying they can be,” Korra chuckled, “I guess I’ll leave you to unpack. I know it’s pretty minimal and not what you’re used to but I hope you’ll be comfortable here. I’ll warn you the beds are hard as a rock, takes a while to get used to. I end up piling blankets on top so I can sleep.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra rubbed the back of her neck nervously, making Asami smile at her nervous tick. It was always that or the hair tugging. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It’s perfect. It’s exactly what I need right now.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra turned awkwardly, making her way to the back of the room. “Well, I guess, I’ll just be leaving-”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami grabbed her hand, pulling her back to her. “Wait! I need to show you something.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Now or never, Sato. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra looked at her with confusion, but Asami just ignored it, pulling out the knapsack from her bag and focusing on the weight of the letters inside it. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Um,” She started, “I don’t really know how to say this. Or explain it. So I’m just going to come out and say it.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra stared at the bag, an eyebrow raised. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“So, when my dad,” She choked on her own words, “Was confessing, he mentioned something about keeping us apart. And my mind just started reeling because since I saw you again, I know we have both been confused about what went down between us. So, before I left I searched his office and I found-” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She took a deep breath, opening up the knapsack and dumping the contents on the bed. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Well, I found this.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra reached a hand to the pile of letters on the bed, confusion apparent on her face. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I kept writing to you, Korra. And apparently you kept writing to me, too. My dad was intercepting them, apparently.” </span>
  <em>
    <span>Did she say apparently twice?</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami’s heart started pounding in her chest as Korra made no movement. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I guess it explains why we both thought the other abandoned us. I know it probably doesn’t change anything between us, but I just wanted you to know-”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Are you kidding? This changes everything between us. This changes everything.” Korra interrupted, grabbing one of the letters in the pile and tearing it open. “I can’t believe this, everything I thought was wrong.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami breathed a sigh of relief, this was going so much better than she expected. The air in the room was still, neither of them knew quite what to say. Was this a good thing? Could they start over again? Or was this the nail in the coffin. A sign that their relationship, whatever it once was, should have been over long ago. <br/></span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>A sudden knock at the door interrupted their loud silence. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Ikki, I swear if you don’t leave us alone!” Korra yelled, turning angrily to the door as it opened, her face reddening as Tenzin walked in. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Good morning, ladies.” Tenzin said smoothly, ignoring the angry outburst from Korra moments earlier. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Remembering her manners, Asami bowed. “Good morning, Tenzin. Thank you so much for inviting me to stay.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra looked like she was about to burst, but Tenzin paid her no mind. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Of course, Asami. If you need anything to be more comfortable simply let me or any of the Acolytes know. Now, Korra, Beifong’s replacement is due to be inducted, and we both need to be there.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Panic spread across Korra’s face. “Can it wait? We were kind of in the middle of something.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Tenzin lowered his eyes and shook his head. “I’m afraid not, and we need to leave now or we are going to be late.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He turned and walked out of the room, expecting Korra to follow him, but she grabbed Asami’s hand and looked into her eyes. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“We are going to talk about this when I get back. I promise you.” She gave the slightest smile and, letter still in hand, turned to follow Tenzin. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Thanks for telling me, Asami.” </span>
</p><hr/><p> </p><p>
  <span>She’s jittering throughout the entire speech, unable to place whether it’s from Siakhan’s </span>
  <em>
    <span>bullshit excuse </span>
  </em>
  <span>for a speech or the nervousness from the information Asami gave her right before. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Maybe both. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Her stomach keeps churning like the ice cream machines she saw in the windows of boutique candy shops in downtown Republic City. Everytime it lurched it was as if a new issue was brought to the forefront of her mind, all the while Saikhan blabbered on about the equalists while Tarrlok stood next to him, looking smug.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>The Equalists. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It wasn’t lost on her that the man she, for many years of her life, considered almost like a father figure, was part of the reason she was in this whole mess. Korra wasn’t one to feel sorry for herself, but how did he see her as a baby and still come to the conclusion she was a danger to this world? How long had he been working against her?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The darker side of her mind worried that she really </span>
  <em>
    <span>was </span>
  </em>
  <span>a danger to this world. Did she hurt Asami growing up? Is that why he kept her from her?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Asami was always so careful with her when they were growing up. When the White Lotus berated her for being too intense, too hot headed, for not thinking before she acted. She remembers getting </span>
  <em>
    <span>so </span>
  </em>
  <span>overwhelmingly excited while being trained and accidentally hurting her mentor. Katara was buried under piles of snow more times than Korra could count. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Did she hurt Asami? Did Asami just never tell her?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She’s walking around the city after the speech, batting this idea in her mind, slowly convincing herself that </span>
  <em>
    <span>she </span>
  </em>
  <span>is the monster. She told Asami she would come back to the island immediately after so they could talk, but how could she possibly face her right now. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Half-baked Avatar in training. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Maybe Tarrlok is right. It would be one thing if she just accidentally hurt people, but she can’t even protect them in exchange. That’s meant to be her, like, one thing-- protecting people. Protect the people of this world. Keep balance. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She really is the worst Avatar ever. She can’t even learn air-bending. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra is about five seconds from completely devolving into a mental breakdown and screaming in the middle of the street when a low voice pulls her attention. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Avatar! You look lost.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She looks down to see a man sitting on the steps of one of the many Air Acolyte temples dotted throughout Republic City. He looks kind, and she’s sure he means well, but she’s already on edge and someone butting into </span>
  <em>
    <span>her </span>
  </em>
  <span>business is the last thing she needs right now. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m fine. Thanks.” She snaps, continuing to walk down the street. She realizes maybe he is a little right, because it’s only then she figures out she has absolutely </span>
  <em>
    <span>no idea </span>
  </em>
  <span>where she is. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I do not mean lost as in your location, I mean in your journey. Why don’t you come inside with me? I was trained by Guru Pathik, the same Guru who helped Avatar Aang so many years ago.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She brings her feet to a halt. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Aang. </span>
  </em>
  <span>That’s another thing she failed at. Every other Avatar had contacted their past lives by her age, and here she was unable to connect at all. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Accept the help that is being offered to you, no Avatar has succeeded on their own.” He offered her a small smile and she sighed and followed him into the building. It’s not like she wanted to go back to Air Temple Island yet anyway. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>…</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Twenty minutes later and she’s forcing herself to sit on her hands in the back room of the temple to keep herself from fidgeting with them. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She’s trying, she really is, to pay attention to what he is telling her to do-- but it’s the same breathing exercises that Tenzin makes her do and no matter how hard she tries, Korra cannot get her mind to slow down enough to do it successfully. She can tell the Guru is getting annoyed, too. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He cracks an eye open, “You cannot airbend.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra huffs, “Yeah, yeah. I know. Glad to know the papers are covering every single one of my failures.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No. I can tell that your chakra is blocked. Did your mentors teach you about chakras?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I mean-- kinda? We went over them in class, I think? There’s seven, right?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He nods, “Opening all seven chakras will allow you to enter the Avatar state, as well as allow you to airbend. But it’s not an easy process, and once we begin it cannot be stopped until all seven chakras are opened.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Korra gulps, “Do you want me to...I mean do you want me to start now?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He laughs quietly, “No, no. You are not ready today, but I can help prepare you to start.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She nods, taking a deep breath and bracing herself, “Okay. Do your worst.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He laughs once again, louder this time. “Korra I’m not fighting you or doing anything physical. Just providing you with some information.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She relaxes slightly, letting out the air she was holding in her diaphragm. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“The Air Chakra is located in the heart. It deals with love. You have lots of people that love you Korra. You may not realize it, being raised in solitude as you were, but so many people love you, and you have a lot of love to share in return. I have no doubt you will be a very powerful airbender once you unlock it.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Her stomach churns once again, unsure how she feels about what he said, but he simply continues. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It is blocked by grief. A loss you have not yet come to terms with-”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Her head shot up, “But I don’t know anyone that died! Not recently!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You can feel intense grief for things other than death, Korra. You can lose people in ways aside from dying. We can mourn lost time, what could have been, opportunities we passed up. I advise you to look within yourself and find what the source of grief is that is blocking your ability to airbend. Because I can guarantee you that airbending is not the only thing this grief is preventing you from accomplishing.”</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Hopefully the next chapter will be sooner! Please comment and let me know what you think :)</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
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